Page 10 of Once Upon An Ever After
He’d been seeing a therapist since he was a kid. At first, to deal with the trauma of losing his parents and then, for what the rest of his life would look like without them. He knew his family thought he had managed to escape that loss without being traumatized but they were wrong. He just reacted to death differently than they had.
Gibson had buried himself in work. Roman had hidden himself away, alone with his demons. Bran had drowned himself in booze and pills. But Dawson had only clung more fiercely to those around him, tried to care for them and be there for them, tried to ensure that they could never, ever leave him like his parents had.
It wasn’t healthy and knowing that didn’t change him. It didn’t make him any more adept at letting people go. It didn’t stop his heart from breaking when he thought of Beau not being part of his life anymore. He had gone to Beau’s apartment because he’d been scared he was losing him and now, he was certain of it.
You’re my best friend. I don’t want to lose you.
Dawson stared at his phone for a long minute, willing those three little dots to pop up, but they never came. That last message showed that it had been read but Beau didn’t respond. He said nothing at all but his silence rang loud in Dawson’s ears.
“Fuck.” Dawson shouted the word at the blank screen and then when he glanced up he winced at the people passing on the street who were watching him. “Sorry.”
They didn’t respond either, hurrying on their way. Dawson sighed and shoved the phone in his pocket. He headed inside the building and was greeted by the man at the front desk. He made small talk, asked if his brother was home, got a confirmation and let the man know to call up and announce him before he took the private elevator to the penthouse apartment on the top floor of the building.
At one point in their lives, not even all that long ago, Dawson wouldn’t have bothered telling the concierge to call up and announce him. But things had changed since Julian Holland moved in with Bran. Dawson didn’t dare take the elevator unannounced anymore, not since the last time when he’d walked into the entryway of the penthouse apartment to hear his brother’s boyfriend demanding, very loudly from somewhere just out of sight, that Bran suck his cock like a good boy.
Dawson shook that thought away like he always did when it tried to remind him it had really happened. He’d been flabbergasted at the time. He’d somehow thought that Bran would be the aggressor in their relationship. He wouldn’t have thought perfectly poised Julian had dirty talk in him but Dawson had been proven wrong.
He’d been wrong about a lot of things lately.
When the doors opened into the entryway of the penthouse apartment, it was Julian Holland that Dawson found waiting for him. It had been months but it still seemed strange to see Julian here. For years, Dawson had only known Julian as his oldest brother Gibson’s executive assistant at Frost Financial. Julian kept Gibson’s schedule and played gatekeeper for who was allowed to see the CEO and when, so Dawson had forged some semblance of a friendship with the man over the years. But the transition from Julian as Gibson’s assistant to Julian as Branson’s live-in boyfriend still managed to surprise him most days.
Maybe because Bran and Jules were so very, very different.
On the surface, they shouldn’t have worked. On paper, they had hardly anything in common. Julian was organized and Bran was chaos personified. Julian was proper and polished and Bran could be crude and immature at times. Julian was professional and Bran, at least until recently, had only ever been a party boy. But together, they fit like two pieces of a puzzle and Dawson had witnessed the ways Bran had changed since Julian became part of his life. Bran was a better man because of Julian and Julian was more relaxed because of Bran. They were lucky to have found one another and never had Dawson been more jealous of their connection than he was in that moment with his own connection to Beau fraying too quickly to mend.
“Dawson?” Julian’s brows drew tight together as soon as he saw him, “What’s wrong? Are you sick? Hurt?”
“No.” Dawson shook his head even as Julian covered the distance between them and grabbed his face to look at him more closely, just like any of his brothers would have done. “I’m fine.”
“You are not fine. You look like you were hit by a truck.” Julian frowned at him and then turned his head and raised his voice to a yell, “Bran! Something’s happened. Your brother is here!”
There was a heavy sigh from somewhere just around the corner and Bran’s voice came back to them before he came into sight, “Dammit Gib, if you’ve got cold feet you should’ve thought about that before… Oh.”
Bran’s eyebrows shot up at the sight of Dawson in the entryway. His older brother had clearly thought it was Gibson on his doorstep and been ready to give him hell about the upcoming wedding. Instead, whatever he’d been about to say next died on his lips as he gave Dawson a once-over. His own brows furrowed as his eyes darted to Julian, as if looking for help when he saw the state his little brother was in.
Dawson regret showing up at their home at so late an hour immediately. They were both in sweatpants and t-shirts. Barefoot and relaxed, they’d clearly been enjoying their night in together. They had probably been happy and already reaching for each other in that way they had of never being able to keep their hands to themselves, before Dawson interrupted.
He started to turn to call the elevator back, “I should just go and leave you two to…”
“Stop.” Bran’s voice was loud in the large entry and Dawson did as he was told, turning back to his brother. Bran frowned but gave a quick jerk of his head, as if he was reminding himself that he could handle whatever this was. “You’re not interrupting anything except an argument about whether chips and dip constitute a meal. Come in. Please.”
Dawson trailed his gaze to Julian who was still standing near him and tried for a smile, “It’s not a meal.”
Julian gifted him with a soft look before wrapping an around Dawson’s shoulder, “Come in and tell that to your brother.”
Bran moved aside so Julian could lead Dawson into the living area. He didn’t miss the way his brother smiled at his boyfriend as they passed though, and his heart ached at the simple warmth and love that radiated between them. He sat down in an armchair and glanced up when Julian moved back towards the edge of the room, all but shoving Bran towards the sofa.
“I’ll go get us some water.” Julian excused himself and headed for the kitchen, leaving the brothers alone as Bran watched him go.
“I’m sorry to just show up like this.”
“It’s fine.” Bran turned back to him, frown reappearing as he looked Dawson over again, “Clearly something is wrong so I’m glad you felt like you could come to me. Whatever it is, I’ll help however I can.”
“I’m not sure anyone can help but I thought, maybe you would understand.”
“Daws. I know I haven’t always been the best brother to you but whatever you need, I’m here.”
He swallowed hard, not wanting to get into Bran’s past when, for once, it was his life that was the mess and needed sorting, “The thing is… You know I’m not gay.”
