Page 37 of Impulsive Saint
“All the things on your list that you haven’t done, are they on it because he didn’t want you to do them? Because he told you that you couldn’t?”
He watched Ashtyn’s face as she took a long drink of her coffee but her poker face was a good one and he didn’t know her well enough to recognize a tell yet. He’d wanted to see if she would flinch at the accusation that her ex-fiancé had been controlling but of course she didn’t. She’d already admitted as much to him and though her eyes looked sad, she gave no other sign that his words had hit their mark.
When she finally spoke it was low, so soft it was barely more than a whisper, “It wasn’t like that. I didn’t do the things on my list because I was scared. Scared of letting my father down, scared of letting Aaron down too. But no, he never told me that I couldn’t do something I wanted to do. He never had to, because I never mentioned them to him.”
“Maybe because you knew he’d have said no if you did.”
She shook her head, “No, Aaron is a good man. He might be too serious and too strict and too single-minded, but everyone has their faults. He’s one of the best men I’ve ever known.”
“A good man, but not good enough for you to marry.”
Ashtyn’s face fell and she shook her head, “That’s not the same thing.”
“No?”
“No.” she said softly, “He is a good man, a great man even, he just wasn’t therightman. And I wasn’t the right woman for him either. Neither of us were who the other wanted us to be. That’s why I couldn’t marry him and I’m sure that given some time and space, he’ll realize I did the right thing.”
“You think he’ll forgive you for leaving him at the altar in front of half of Nashville?”
“A girl is allowed to dream right?” Ashtyn put her coffee cup down and sighed, “I can’t eat anything else or I’m going to be sick and I’m not drinking that thing.” She pointed at the grayish liquid sludge he had ordered. “I’ll write my list down while you finish eating but before I do, I want to be clear about something.”
“Okay.” He motioned for her to continue.
“It’smylist. It’s about me. All of this is about me. Not Aaron. Not my father. Me.”
He saw the determination in the set of her shoulders and knew that she really meant it. For the first time in her life, Ashtyn had decided to put her wants and desires above those of her family and friends. She was doing this for herself and nobody else and it was clear that while she would allow him to help her that if he didn’t, or couldn’t, that she would find a way to do it on her own.
And damn if that streak of determination and defiance didn’t make him like her even more.
“Okay.” He picked up a piece of bacon and motioned to the pen, “Start writing. I can’t wait to see this list of yours.”
She offered a grin that hit him square in the chest and he pulled his eyes back to his plate to keep from staring at her. Even hungover, with her hair in a low, messy ponytail and dark circles under her eyes, there was still no denying the girl was absolutely gorgeous. Add in her smart mouth and iron spine and she was damn near irresistible.
Tyler shook his head, trying to knock away that thought. She was a job, he reminded himself. She’d been engaged. She’d been about to walk down the aisle with another man forty-eight hours ago. He hadn’t even known her before that chance encounter in the alley and though he’d been pulled into her mess, he wasn’t going to make it messier by acting on the attraction he felt towards her.
He might be a screw-up as far as his brothers were concerned but he wasn’t an asshole.
As he swallowed and then picked up his water to take a drink, he leaned forward to read what she’d started to write. He laughed, which made her glance up at him. He leaned back and shook his head.
“Ride a motorcycle. Take a road trip. Get drunk. Dance on a bar. Correct me if I’m wrong but you knocked those out already. Why are you bothering to write them down?”
She shrugged, “I like checking things off to-do lists.”
That made him laugh, “Somehow that doesn’t surprise me.”
She continued, putting check marks by the things they’d done already. He could read most of the napkin even upside down. He smiled as he watched her write but when she paused and glanced back up at him from beneath her lashes, biting her bottom lip far too suggestively for his liking he felt heat curl in his belly and stomped it down immediately.
“Don’t you dare write one-night stand on that list, Ashtyn.”
She flushed a pretty shade of pink, “How did you know…”
“You mentioned it last night. Remember?”
That made her cringe, “Oh yeah… unfortunately I do.”
“Don’t put it on the list.”
She smirked, “But it is on my list.”
