Page 30 of Coming Home to You
Beck and I finish our beers and as I stand up, I realize those shots I did with Erin early on are starting to kick in.Beck slips his arm around my waist as we both yell a good night to Pop.
“Come on my drunk girl, let’s get you home,” Beck says, planting a kiss on the top of my head.
“You know I’ll always be your girl,” I tell him and I don’t know where it comes from.Why did I say that out loud?
“You’ve been my girl since the day I watched you catch that thirty pound bass on your dad’s boat,” Beck jokes.
“Oh, god, don’t remind me.”
“You were screaming like a girl because you were so scared you hurt it.Your dad and I were jumping up and down.That fucker was huge.”
“But I made you get the hook out and throw it back,” I say, remembering exactly what Beck looked like then.Boyish, but still so incredible and I wanted him before I had ever spoken a word to him.
“I couldn’t say no to you and neither could your dad,” Beck adds and it makes me smile.Beck continues and what he says next surprises me.“But that wasn’t actually the day I realized I wanted you to be mine.I knew I wanted you long before I ever even met you.”
He looks down at me and his eyes are full of love.I can see it in his face and hear it in his voice as he talks about our past.It makes my heart swell in my chest, but it also makes me want to cry.
Beck unlocks the front door, scooping me up in his arms; he carries me to the bedroom, setting me down on the bed as he kisses me slowly.
His lips brush over mine as his tongue slips into my mouth.Everything about it is perfect.Slow and sweet.
He pulls my skirt down and my shirt over my head and unhooks my bra tossing everything off to the side as he does the same with his clothes.
Beck climbs in bed next to me, pulling me into his arms, I settle myself against him, fitting perfectly.I want this night and everything about us to stay this way forever.I need Beck; I can’t lose him a second time.
“Tell me something else you remember about me,” I whisper as the sound of the waves fill the room; a lulled silence with only the sounds of the ocean and our breathing cutting through the night.
I feel Beck smile and I wait.
Chapter Twelve
Beck
As I lie here staring up at the ceiling, Kelsey asleep in my arms, my mind drifts back to memories from our past.When she asked me to tell her something else I remembered about her, I’d said the first thing that popped into my head, probably the single greatest night of my life.
“Tell me something else you remember about me,” she’d whispered.
I smiled.“The night I took your virginity,” I said.
“Beck,” Kelsey said, lightly whacking me on the chest.
I grabbed her hand, holding it in mine as I said, “No, Kels, it’s not like that, baby.”
“What is it like then?”she asked.
I lifted our joined hands to my mouth and pressed a kiss against her knuckles.“It was the first time you told me that you loved me,” I whispered.“And the first time I’d admitted out loud that I loved you.”Kelsey had snuggled closer then, understanding what it was about that night that I was talking about.“And everything that came after was so much better because of it,” I said, kissing the top of her head.
“Yeah,” she’d said, her mouth on my chest as she straddled my hips and kissed her way to my mouth to remind me all over again.“It was.”
And as I lie here with her in my arms now, her body still hot, but her soft, slow breaths letting me know she’s asleep, I can’t help but admit it again.Admit what I’ve been fighting for the last ten years, what seeing her again has finally forced me to acknowledge.
“I love you, Kels,” I whisper, knowing she’s already asleep and probably won’t hear me.
But it doesn’t make the words mean any less and it doesn’t mean I’d take them back if she could hear me.I’d wake her up and tell her right now if I could just figure out a way to make what I’m feeling be enough.But despite everything that’s happened between us, the amazing night and day we’ve just spent together, nothing has changed.
I still have a life in Boston, and Kelsey still has her life here in Rockport.And I know none of the things that were between us ten years ago have changed.If anything, Ryan coming up here now has only served as a reminder of all the things that are still waiting for me.
“Fuck…” I breathe out, my arm tightening as Kelsey stirs in my arms.
