Page 16 of The Fine Art of Faking It
“My head doesn’t feel good,” he announced with a little pout as he swayed backwards, pressing his bare ass cheeks against the glass door.
“I’m sure it doesn’t,” Eden sighed, peeking between her fingers despite her best efforts. She didn’t want to be sympathetic. Not to him. Not after the years of judgment she’d endured because of him. It was his fault that Layla even had to ask about The Incident.
Yet here he was, naked from the waist down—an obvious shower, not a grower—and looking needy. She cursed that stupid Blue Moon Business of the Year award.
Steam billowed out of the shower. “Go on,” Eden said, more gently this time. “Get in and I’ll be back with fresh clothes.”
She watched as Davis stepped into the shower with his shirt still on.
“Shirt, Davis!”
“Oh. Right.” The sopping wet, stinking mess hit her squarely in the face. She would have gagged from the smell, but Davis’s naked silhouette was eating up all her senses at the moment.
She stripped the trash bag from the can next to the sink and stuffed his clothing in it. She’d give her industrial-sized washer and dryer a crack at the smell, but if they failed she’d be burning his clothes along with the chair in the lobby.
“Try not to drown,” Eden called, backing out of the room.
She slipped downstairs into the utility room that housed her gleaming laundry components and said a little prayer as she set the washer on “disaster” mode. Back upstairs she surveyed her options for clothing the naked Davis.
He had butt dimples. Cute ones.Oh, God. Where had that thought come from?
She mentally ran through her current guests. There were a handful of men, but none in quite the right size or quite the right character that she would feel comfortable asking them to borrow some spare clothes.
With a huff, she marched into her living quarters and dug through her dresser. Davis was going to spend the rest of his day in a pair of her yoga pants and a V-neck t-shirt. She grabbed a pair of fuzzy knee socks and added them to the pile.
It was the best she could do for now. Besides, it was only for a few hours until someone found him a more permanent place to stay.
Eden debated leaving the clothes on the bed in his room but heard a squeaky thump from the bathroom.
“Now what?” she muttered under her breath. Eden opened the door to find Davis sprawled on the floor of the shower, eyes closed, water pouring over his head in a steady river. He was going to drown in her guest room, and then the cops would really be asking questions.
“Davis,” she snapped. Eden reached inside the shower and turned off the water. “Hey!”
He opened one eye and then the other. “You’re really pretty,” he slurred again.
“We’ve already established that,” she said, stepping into the shower stall and doing her best to wrestle his wet, naked body into a standing position.
“You don’t like me, right?” Davis asked, reaching out to touch her nose in slow motion. “Booooop.”
“Are you kidding me right now?” Eden yanked a towel off the bar and shoved it into his hands. “Dry off and put those clothes on,” she said, pointing to the decidedly feminine wardrobe she’d provided.
She left him alone in the bathroom to wrestle his way into her clothing. Her watch vibrated indicating a new text message.
Layla: Sorry about before. Just doing my job.
Eden and Layla had been friends since junior high when an eighth-grade boy had farted into Layla’s trumpet’s mouthpiece while she was getting a drink from the water fountain. Eden had saved Layla from impending fart mouth, and together the two of them had pummeled Pond Birkbeck into submission. Now, her so-called-friend was questioning whether Eden had it in her to burn down a house in front of her guests.
She tucked her phone away again, deciding to deal with Layla later and instead focused on taking inventory of the room. Pillows? Check. Quilt? Check. TV remote? Check. Dish of candy? Check.
The bathroom door opened and Davis shuffled into the bedroom. Eden bit the inside of her cheek to keep from laughing. The yoga pants were stretched to capacity to accommodate Davis’s package.
“Now I get why women wear these so often. I’ve never been more comfortable,” Davis announced stretching from side to side.
“Okay, let’s not overdo it on the motion,” Eden said.
“I threw up in your shower,” he said.
“Is this Ruin Eden’s Life Day?”
