Page 69 of The Fine Art of Faking It
She couldn’t help herself. Eden looked around the table at the happy couples. The love, the intimacy, theconnectionwas palpable. It was beautiful, this sharing, this building a life together. And for one shining second she could see them, walking the vines, sharing a bottle of wine on the porch, watching dogs and kids play in the yard…
“Eden Moody! You get off that horrible man’s lap right this minute!”
“Mom?”
Lilly Ann in her date night caftan peered over Ned’s shoulder in horror. They were wedged between two high-top tables, the occupants of which were rearranging themselves for better views of the impending fight. Eden’s ashen-faced father looked as though he’d just walked in on his own parents in the middle of a swingers’ party. Her mother didn’t condone physical violence, but with the murderous expression on her face right now, Eden wondered if she was willing to make an exception.
“How could you?” Lilly Ann howled flinging both arms out wide, tangling pint glasses in her bell sleeves. “How could she, Ned?”
Eden’s father shook his head slowly, morosely. “Where did we go wrong, Lilly Ann?”
Eden could have given them a list of all their wrong turns, but she didn’t feel that now was the appropriate time.
She jumped out of Davis’s lap, conscious of the stares directed their way. Just another weeknight in Blue Moon with a family feud spilling out into a public restaurant.
“You are a bad, bad man,” Lilly Ann announced, wielding her finger like a wand at Davis. “And I hope you are rendered impotent and your children are redheads.”
“Hey!” The trio of redheads piped up from the table.
“No offense,” Lilly Ann said. “You three are simply stunning.”
“How can I be impotentandhave children?” Davis whispered. Eden elbowed him in his very solid abs.
“Mom, Dad, I can explain,” Eden began.
They stared at her expectantly, hurt and disappointment radiating off of them.
“Well?” Ned prodded.
“How about we step outside?” Davis suggested. He rose, dropped some bills on the table, and grabbed their coats.
“I’m not stepping anywhere with you!” Lilly Ann shrieked. “You’ll probably shove me in front of a moving car!”
“Enough! Mother. Outside, now!” Eden grabbed her mother’s arm and started dragging. She didn’t stop until they made it outside the brewery.
Ned stomped along behind them with Davis on his heels. “I got this,” Eden told him.
But Davis shook his head. “Not leaving.”
Lilly Ann blew a raspberry in Davis's direction.
“Oh, real mature, Mom.” Eden’s breath puffed out into the night air on a silvery cloud.
“After everything his family put us through, you’re just willing to forgive and forget? His second cousin Wooster stole my hamster!” If Ned’s voice got any higher, the dog population of Blue Moon and its surrounding areas would be arriving at any moment.
As it was, Eden could hear Joey’s dog, Waffles, howling from the horse barn just down the road.
“I’m not even going to point out the irony of you two growing up in the hippie-est damn town on the entire east coast and complaining about forgiveness,” she said, putting her hands on her hips. “For the record, Davis and I arenotdating!”
“Oh, so you’re just having sex then?” The rage had gone out of Lilly Ann. Apparently having sex with one’s enemies was fine.
“Oh my God, Mom! We’re not even doing that,” Eden hissed out. “We are nothing. There is nothing between us but a plan to get revenge on the Beautification Committee for trying to match usandfor burning down Davis’s house in the process.”
That shut them up, Eden thought triumphantly.
Davis was looking at her. His face was in shadows, but she could feel something radiating off of him. Disappointment? She couldn’t tell.
“The Beautification Committee tried to match the two of you?” Lilly Ann pointed at them both.
