Page 134 of Finally Mine
“You have that ‘I made a huge mistake’ look written all over your puppy dog eyes,” Sophie said, pointing a finger in her face. “And for the fucking record, you did make a huge mistake if you’re telling me that you and Aldo broke up.”
“Well, we did. Not that it’s any of your business,” Gloria said primly.
“Don’t get all fussy with me. I should take that coffee back,” she said, eyeing Gloria’s cup.
“I will slap the daylights out of you if you try.”
But instead of laughing, Sophie stood up. “Is Aldo okay? Or are you just like my brother and pretending you never knew the man?”
“Aldo is going to be fine.” She thought of the look on his face when she’d walked out. The hurt. The utter agony. She closed her eyes. “This is the only way he’s not going to get hurt in the long run.”
“I’m going to hurt you in the short run, Gloria. I don’t even feel bad about threatening an abuse victim with more violence. That’s how mad you’re making me.”
“Sophie, not everyone is as strong as you are. Okay?” Gloria said wearily. “Not everyone is lucky enough to know who they are, what they want, and how to get it. Some of us are damaged and won’t ever be fixed.”
“Bull. Shit. You think because you went through some shit in your life that you’re unlovable or incapable of love? Between you and my brother, I don’t know who I want to slap more. It doesn’t matter what happens to you. In the end, all we are is our ability to love. That never gets taken away or diminished. It’s dumb chickenshits like you two who try to hide from it. You’re as capable of loving as I am.”
“Jeez, don’t hold back or anything,” Gloria said, getting to her feet.
“The whole damn world has gone insane,” Sophie snapped, stomping toward the door. “You know what I’m going to do? I’m going to go crawl back in bed with my husband and show him all the ways I’m so grateful he isn’t half the dumbass you all are!”
With a slam of the door, Sophie was gone, and Gloria was alone again.
76
“He asked you to move in with him?” Gloria’s mother patted a hand over her heart. “I’m so happy for you, Gloria! He is a good man.” In celebration, she stabbed the button on the blender, working her magic on a pitcher of strawberry margaritas. The glasses that Aldo had thoughtfully chosen lined up next to it.
Gloria sucked in a breath and finished the rest of the miserable story. “I told him I needed some space. Some time to think,” she said loudly over the blender.
Her mother turned off the blender abruptly. Sara’s long, quiet look communicated quite a lot. So did her “hmm.”
“What?” Gloria felt defensive now. She shouldn’t be so quick to jump into such a serious relationship. She needed time to heal, time to grow on her own. She was beingresponsible.She slid off the stool to pace. “I’m not rushing into a commitment. Again,” she said, ignoring the fact that she had already rushed into the commitment and then promptly backed out of it.
“You were sixteen,mija. No sixteen-year-old is equipped to make good, informed decisions. You’re all hormones and angst and ‘my mother doesn’t understand me.’”
In a lot of ways, Gloria felt like she was still sixteen, standing in her mother’s kitchen defending her life’s decisions. “Mama,” she rolled her eyes. “I know what I’m doing. It isn’t the right time.”
“I am listening to your words and not believing them. I don’t think you believe them either,” Sara pointed out, crossing her arms over her chest. Her earrings, delicate silver bells, danced from her lobes as if shivering from the judgment Sara was firing in her direction.
“It seems like we’re moving too fast. We’re both coming out of difficult situations, and now we’re spending Thanksgiving together, and he’s asking me to move in. What’s next? An engagement? Marriage? Kids?”
“If that’s what you want, yes! Is it what you want?”
“Of course! But when the time is right. Not when I’m only seven months out of a nightmare.”
“Okay. What is enough time? A year? Three? Ten? How much more time do you want to waste because of Glenn Diller?”
That hurt. She felt it like a wound on her already dented heart.
“This isn’t because of Glenn, Mama! Yes, I’m being more cautious now because of the lessons I learned. Isn’t that what being an adult is? Learning from your mistakes? Doing better?” It was suddenly imperative to Gloria that she make her mother understand.
“So, what then? Do you wait to find a partner until you are perfect?”
“Of course not, Mama.”Broken people were never perfect.
“No. You choose a man—or woman—who will grow and change with you. Who will support you as you grow and change, not force you to stay the same.”
They squared off on opposite sides of the peninsula. The blender of frozen happiness between them had lost its cheer.
