Page 70 of Forever Never
“Don’t what? Damn it, Brick. Don’t you want me?”
“Is that what you think?”
“I’m tired of thinking, of guessing. Spell it out for me. You’re there every time I need you, sometimes evenbeforeI know I need you. You know all my deepest, darkest secrets. You are the only person who can tell when I’m lying. When you look at me after you’ve worn through all your willpower for the day, sometimes it looks like you can’t decide if you want to devour me or destroy me.”
She could see the clench of his jaw, how the cords of his neck stood out, and knew he was close to breaking.
“God damn it, Remi. Please stop talking.” But he didn’t back up. He didn’t take his hand off her. It anchored her to the spot, to him. It gave her the focus and the strength to see it through.
“You need to say it,” she insisted. “One way or another, you need to tell me where I stand with you.”
“You’re safe with me. That’s all you need to know.” His fingers curled into the flesh of her shoulder like they couldn’t help themselves.
“Oh, for Pete’s sake. I’m sick of being safe. Aren’t you tired of protecting me?”
“Yes!” he bellowed. “I’m fucking exhausted! Are you happy? I’m tired of keeping you out of trouble and keeping my damn hands off you.”
Her hands shot up triumphantly. “Finally!” The transformation was already beginning. He could see her as something more than his little brother’s annoying friend. He would let herbemore.
“Remi. You’re leaving for school in a couple of weeks,” he said.
“What’s that got to do with anything?” To her, a summer fling was the epitome of adulthood. Being grown-up to enjoy a temporary relationship that they both could look back on fondly? Share secret winks across the Thanksgiving table. Maybe pick back up where they left off once she was done with college. Yes, please. Sign her up.
“You’re leaving,” he said stubbornly.
“And?”
His jaw clenched in that adorably annoyed way of his. “And I don’t want to ruin you.”
“Ruin me? Good lord, man, have you had your ears cleaned? I’m not a virgin.”
“Jesus, Remi!” He threw a glance over his shoulder and towed her into the alleyway between buildings away from the spring foot traffic. He kicked the decorative gate shut behind them and deposited her against the cool stone of the building. “If I let myself touch you? If I let myself go? Neither of us would survive.”
“Well, somebody ate a bowl of Humble Flakes for breakfast this morning. Your chivalry issoadmirable,” she snapped.
“You and your goddamn smart mouth.”
“Go ahead. Teach me a lesson,” she taunted.
He leaned in until their foreheads touched. She wished she could bottle the smell of him. She’d call it First Crush and make a billion dollars.
“Remi, baby, if you knew one-tenth of the things I’ve thought about doing, you’d run away and never look back.”
Her heart was hammering in her chest as adrenaline and lust released into her bloodstream. “I don’t run, Brick.” No one had ever made her feel like he did. And deep down in some secret part, she was worried no one ever would.
“You better fucking start now.” His voice was barely a rasp.
“If I reached under that belt right now, what would I find?” To drive her point home, she curled her fingertips into the waistband of his jeans.
He squeezed his eyes shut and hissed. “Jesus.”
“No use praying for help. Jesus isn’t worried about your dick, Brick.”
“I’m not touching you.” He gritted out the words like a rusty mantra.
“What if I touch you?” she whispered. She’d lost the thread of the fight. Lost the point she was trying to make. She skated her fingers over the buckle and listened to the intake of his breath. “Do you want me to? If you do, you have to say it. You can’t just hope it’ll happen. You need to say the words.”
She watched his face change as he looked down at her, something like pain in his eyes. Oh, God. He was going to walk away. He was going to stroll down the sidewalk and leave her with wet panties and a broken heart. And she was going to have to make it her life’s mission to torture the man for the rest of his earthly years.
