Page 102 of No More Secrets
“You pregnant?”
Summer choked on her water and had the horses’ heads raising to see what the fuss was. “God. No. I’m not pregnant. I don’t know if kids are in my future.”
“And you’re worried that Carter wants a family?”
Summer nodded. “Yeah.”
“I’ve never heard him say in so many words that he wants a pack of rugrats.”
“But ...” Summer prodded.
“But look at what they come from. John and Phoebe raised them right and had a damn good time doing it. I wouldn’t be surprised if they all planned to have big, sloppy families. It’s just not something that guys talk about.”
“That’s what I was thinking, too,” Summer said, tears pricking at her eyes. “But they don’t know that not all families end up this way. And who knows if I can even have —” she stopped herself. If she wasn’t telling Carter, she wasn’t telling anyone.
“If you can even have what? Kids?” Joey asked.
Summer shook her head, waved the question away. “I need to get back. Thanks for the water.”
She had gotten carried away. Swept up. That’s what had happened, Summer decided as she followed the path from the stables to the house. It was all so romantic that she didn’t even notice she was careening off track. This couldn’t work. One of them would have to give up everything.
There he was. As if she had conjured him. Carter waited for her on a grassy rise behind the little barn. His hands shoved in the pockets of his shorts, and on his face an expression of concern.
“Hey,” he said, reaching for her when she approached.
Summer danced out of his grasp. “Hi.” She hated herself. Hated her circumstances for what she was about to do.
“What’s wrong?”
She took a trembling breath and began. “I’m concerned that we’re moving too fast.”
He shoved his hands back in his pockets and cocked his head to the side. “Tell me why you feel that way.” His voice was calm and neutral and for some reason that made it worse.
She needed it to be over and done with.
“I think we want different things and I don’t see why one of us should have to change to make the other one happy. It’s just not working.” The words tumbled out in an avalanche.
“Summer,” he reached for her again and this time caught her by the shoulders. “Honey, tell me what’s wrong.”
“I don’t want what you want.” She could barely see him through the tears that swam before her eyes. “I need some time to think. Some time and space.”
His grip tightened on her. “You’re not telling me the truth.”
She wasn’t. But she dug in anyway. “I am.”
“I want to build a life with you. A family, a future. I never thought I’d be able to say those words and mean them. But I am and I do. I love you Summer. My heart has belonged to you since the second I saw you standing in the driveway. Your eyes matched the flowers and I knew then that you belonged here.”
“Carter,” her voice broke. “I know you think you mean those things, but you can’t. You don’t know everything.”
“Because you’ve been treating this like an interview, not a relationship, Summer. I want to know you. I want to know everything.” He threaded his fingers through her hair and twin tears swam hotly down her cheeks.
“I can’t give you everything you want.”
“What do I want?”
Me. But he wouldn’t. Not if he knew.The tears came faster with the panic.
“Summer, this has to be a two-way street. We can’t move forward when you don’t trust me.”
