Page 49 of No More Secrets
“I was supposed to follow in his footsteps. Be theNew York Times’second-generation Lentz.”
“But you didn’t want that?”
She shook her head. “So much had changed in journalism by then. It was one of the reasons my father left the paper and started teaching. Where he saw a decline in print, I saw an opportunity for growth on the digital side. Newspapers weren’t quick to change so I set my sights on magazines. They were faster to adapt to the demand for digital resources.”
She closed her eyes, remembering the conversation. The argument. The hurt.
“I expected some resistance from him. You can’t expect a newsman to just forget about the newsprint that’s been in his blood for twenty-five years. But he dug in so deep and I didn’t expect it. He was very disappointed when I shifted my focus in college and even more so when I took the job atIndulgence.”
Disappointed was a kind word.
When she changed her major her junior year, he cut off her college funding after a spectacular Thanksgiving dinner argument. Phil Lentz was used to getting his way. Used to having his little girl agree with his well-formed and well-communicated opinions.
But didn’t she deserve to stand on her own two feet?
“How are things now?” Carter skimmed his hand down her arm.
“Chilly,” she said, with a grim smile. “A little better now that we don’t see each other twice a month for Sunday dinner anymore. Less disappointment to be felt by all.”
“He’s disappointed in you and your choices, but does your father know that he disappointed you?”
Leave it to Carter to get to the heart of the matter.
She shook her head. “No. When he refused to listen to my reasons for going into magazine work, I refused to keep defending my decision. We don’t talk much now.” She looked up and out, over the gentle shadows of hills and fields.
She leaned into Carter, wanting to feel that solid presence.
Summer smiled sadly. “I bet your mom wouldn’t let something like that happen.”
Carter’s laugh was soft. “No, Phoebe Pierce would not stand for estrangement. She’d show up at your door every day for as long as it would take for you to let her in again.”
“She’s a wonderful person.”
“We are very lucky to have her. Lucky to have had our dad, too. Together they were something. I think that’s why none of us have gotten close to marriage yet. They set the bar pretty damn high and none of us want to settle for anything less.”
“I love how close you all are,” Summer said, envy in her tone. “Sometimes in a city of millions I feel like I’m all alone. Maybe more often than not.” She looked down at her feet.
Why was she spilling all this?
“Summer, you’re never alone,” Carter’s grip on her tightened. “You’re an honorary Mooner. We don’t let anyone be alone. This group of well-meaning weirdos got me through a lot.”
“Like what?” She liked the way she felt with his arm around her. Liked the way her name sounded on his lips.
“Like when I came home with bullet holes and anxiety so bad I still felt like I was in the field.”
They stopped walking and Summer turned to face him. “I’m so sorry, Carter.”
“PTSD, they said it was. But I got through it, thanks to these people,” he jerked a thumb behind them. “Beckett would get in the ring with me when I felt like I couldn’t fight back the shadows alone. Fighting someone felt better to me than fighting something. Those first few weeks back were a nightmare. One or both of us was constantly sporting a black eye.” He shook his head at the memory.
“I had help on the farm, help with the house. Mom made me lunch every day and stayed until I was better. Jax called every damn day for six weeks straight. And Joey got me on horseback. The closer I got to animals, to nature, to real people the more pieces of my soul I got back.”
Summer laid a hand on his arm. “What was it like? The PTSD.”
He looked out into the darkness. “Like everything was a threat. Like there was no hope or happiness. Just a constant state of alert. And I was angry. It took a long time to feel anything but anger or fear. But through that I learned that we’re stronger together.”
Carter put his hands on her waist and pulled her in.
“How do you feel now?” she breathed, her heart hammering in her ears.
