Page 121 of Things We Hide from the Light
“Today’s your lucky day,” Lewis announced.
I sighed. “What do you need?”
“I got an FTA who just popped up on the grid in your neck of the woods.”
FTA was bounty hunter speak for “failure to appear,” a label slapped on people who skipped out on court dates, endangering the money bail bonds companies coughed up for their freedom. “You know I switched to assets for a reason,” I reminded him.
I’d paid my dues for one very long year as a bail enforcement agent before making the switch to asset recovery investigations.
“Yeah, but you’re so good at it. More importantly, you’re right there. I can’t get anyone else there before tomorrow.”
“I’m in charge of two intoxicated women right now. I can’t just leave them to fend for themselves. They’ll end up with matching tattooed eye shadow.”
“Take them along. This guy isn’t dangerous. He’s just stupid. Well, technically he’s crazy smart, which makes him stupid.”
I was familiar with the type.
“Show your friends how Legs Solavita runs down a bad guy.”
“What did he skip on?”
“A two-million-dollar bond.”
“Two million? What the hell did he do?”
“Hacked into the state’s DMV, created a bunch of fake IDs, then sold them online.”
Computer nerds were generally less dangerous to apprehend than, say, murderers or other violent offenders. All you had to do was grab their laptop and then use it to lure them into the back seat of your car. But I still wasn’t taking chances with my very new, very drunk friends.
“I don’t think it’s a good idea, Lew.”
“Look. I hate to play this card, but you owe me. I’ll split the payout with you.”
“I hate you and your busted ass.” I groaned. “I’ll do it tomorrow.”
“Actually, it’s gotta be in the next hour. He’s skipping town and I don’t know where he’ll land next. I need him in custody.”
“Damn it, Lew.” I peered through the glass at Naomi and Sloane. “You swear he’s not dangerous?”
“I’d send my own grandma to pick him up if she lived closer.”
I sighed. “Fine. But this means we’re even.”
“Even Steven,” he promised.
“And no more jokes about me busting your ass,” I added.
“I’ll text you the address and a pic. Thank you. You’re the best. I’m hanging up now before you change your mind. Bye!” he said quickly before disconnecting the call.
Swearing under my breath, I headed back inside, my headache blooming like a damn rose.
“Hey, Lina Bo-Bina! Want some fries?” Sloane asked.
I looked at the table. Naomi and Sloane had eaten their pie and my pie and then moved on to the French fries the elderly couple left behind.
I flagged down the server. “Can I give you a hundred-dollar tip to babysit these two while I go run an errand?”
She blew her auburn bangs out of her face. “Sorry, honey. I’m not falling for that one again.” She pointed to a sign on the wall. It read,Unattended drunks will be arrested.
