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She liberated the wrapped package from a dented metal bread box labeledScrews & Stuff.

Nick glanced up from the plates he was piling high with nachos, tacos, and French fries.

“So I got you something,” she said, suddenly feeling self-conscious. While most of their relationship had moved at warp speed, this was the first birthday they’d celebrated together. There were expectations attached to these kinds of things, and she didn’t want to mess it up.

“Gimme.” He snatched the gift out of her hands and tore at the wrapping paper like a toddler on Christmas morning.

“Whoa. Okay. So you’re into presents. I didn’t see that coming.”

“What’s not to like about stuff other people buy you?” He held up the box and examined it. “The Thin Manbox set?”

“It’s Blu-rays of these black-and-white movies about a private investigator and his wife, Nick and Nora Charles, and their dog, Asta. They drink a lot and solve mysteries.”

He looked up at her and grinned. “Sounds like it’s right up my alley. Good gift.”

“Yeah?”

His eyes went lusty. “Yeah. Why don’t you come over here and let me tell you to your face?”

“My face or my boobs?” she teased, sidling closer.

“Why not both?”

His strong, warm hands settled on her hips. His lips were closing the distance from hers. Her pulse kicked into overdrive.

It was right about then that two things happened simultaneously. Something cold and wet grazed her leg, and the kitchen lights snapped on.

Riley yelped and jumped backward, falling ass over feet over Burt’s back.

“I told you I smelled nacho cheese,” Mrs. Penny announced from the doorway. She was wearing a hockey jersey and men’s boxers. Lily appeared behind her in a pink robe embroidered with kittens.

“Ooooh! Are we having a party?”

“We were,” the birthday boy snarled.

10

7:14 a.m. Friday, November 1

Nick woke fully hard from a dream about Riley in that red dress. He could hear the rain as it pattered against the windows. With his eyes still closed, he snuggled closer to Riley, relishing the feel of her warm body against his.

“Mmmph,” she said.

“Morning, beautiful.” He pressed his lips to her nape.

“We need to find jobs that let us sleep more,” she grumbled into her pillow.

“What if I find a creative way to wake you?” He’d already run through sixteen morning sex scenarios in his mind and had narrowed it down to five.

“Be my guest,” she said, burrowing deeper into the pillow.

“Challenge accepted.” Nick rolled her over.

She was grinning up at him, and he was feeling like the king of fucking Harrisburg when their doorknob rattled.

“This the bathroom?” Mr. Willicott called.

“Go the hell away, Willicott!” Nick yelled.