Page 140 of The Body in the Backyard
“Six tacos. A medium-speed chase with potential suspects. A foam pit full of vomit.”
“That cleaning fee is definitely going on Gentry’s tab.”
Riley was about to argue when she realized they were heading in the wrong direction.
“Why are we crossing the river?” she asked with a sinking feeling.
“It’s because of the Code Cold Burrito,” Nick said as if that explained everything.
“What does a cold burrito have to do with crossing the river, Nick?”
She knew it before he made the turn up the hill she was hoping he wouldn’t. “Nooooo. Nick! I’ve had a really long day. I don’t have the energy to pretend to be nice when someone is aggressively passive-aggressive to my face.”
32
10:08 p.m. Sunday, November 3
“Hello, Riley. So nice of you to move your family tree of progressively weirder guests into my home without giving me a choice,” Dr. Marie Santiago said coolly when she opened the front door of her home.
Riley didn’t think it would go over well if she pointed out that she wasn’t actually related to any of them.
“What’s the matter, Ma? Wasn’t your trophy big enough tonight?” Nick asked, pressing a perfunctory kiss to his mother’s cheek as he walked past her into the house.
“It wasn’t a trophy, Nicholas. It was a crystal award.”
“You did say it was kinda small,” Nick’s dad, Miguel, piped up from behind Marie’s shoulder.
Marie sent her husband a withering look that he seemed completely immune to. “I’m not someone fazed by the size of my award?—”
“Yes, you are,” Nick and Miguel said together.
“Whatdoesbother me is the half dozen protesters chanting nonsense at the attendees from outside and then coming home to discover mysontold a battalion of strangers where we keep the spare key and invited them to move in with us.”
“You had already said yes to Gentry. I figured what’s a couple more bodies? Besides, it’s just for one night. Four tops,” Nick called over his shoulder as he dragged Riley inside.
“Oh God,” Riley muttered. She didn’t think she could survive one night under this roof, let alone four. She’d have to take matters into her own hands and murder Griffin herself just so it would all be over.
“Hello, Gabriel. It’s nice to see you without your accusatory bed linens,” Marie said crisply.
Gabe either didn’t get the sarcasm or had graduated to the level of pretending not to get the sarcasm. “Thank you for inviting me into your home, Dr. Santiago,” he said, taking her hand in both of his. “It is lovely to see you outside the yoga studio.”
Riley decided she needed to take a page out of Gabe’s book and become immune to Marie’s caustic wit.
“What’d he say?” Miguel demanded in a half shout.
“Ugh. I can’t even with you right now, Miguel,” Marie said. “And you!” She turned back to Nick.
“What did I do?” he asked, feigning innocence.
“Why couldn’t you date Claireabell Stewart’s daughter. She’s an ophthalmologist. I have her number, and unlikesome others, I doubt that she would ever need to use your parents’ homeas a safe house,” Marie screeched, looking directly at Riley.
Riley pointed at herself. “Me?”
“First of all, Ma, Claireabell Stewart’s daughter isn’t an ophthalmologist anymore. I served her the papers in the lawsuit that took away her license for trying to make meth in her practice’s break room.”
“An ex-doctor is still better than a current psychic.”
“Second,” Nick continued, ignoring his mother, “I’m in love with Riley Freaking Thorn, and if you can’t deal with that, you and me are going to have a big problem.”
