Page 119 of Story of My Life
He turned to me. “By the way, this isn’t the playground.”
“I don’t have the energy for you or your metaphors right now,” I told him.
“You can’t pull the pigtails of a girl you like and expect her to like you back, dumbass.”
“What girl?” I hedged, pretending I didn’t know exactly whom he was talking about.
“See?” Gage said to Levi. “He’s a dumbass.”
I rolled my eyes. “I don’t like Hazel. I just don’t want her to like you.”
Levi clapped a hand on my shoulder. “You sound like a fucking idiot.”
“Look, no matter what your ‘feelings’ are,” Gage said, using annoying air quotes, “you gotta stop being a dick to her. She’s a client. The biggest we’ve had in years.”
“Yeah? You’ve been flirting with her nonstop, and every time I turn around, Livvy is tripping over his size fourteens around her,” I said.
“First of all, I have not been flirting with her,” Gage interrupted.
Instead of defending himself, Levi opened a bag of chips and popped one into his mouth.
“Nothing to say for yourself?” I demanded.
“Nope.” He crunched. “But I did catch Cam on a date with Hazel.”
“Thanks. Thanks a lot, Livvy,” I snarled.
Gage groaned. “Man, I say this with love. I really do. But are you fucking kidding me right now? Are you on some kind of self-destruct setting? Why the hell would you think it was a good idea to make a move when our business is on the line?”
“It was a onetime thing. I took her out on a fake date for research purposes. It was her idea. I was just being nice.”
“You’re never nice,” Gage argued. “You can’t fuck around with her. You leave a trail of bodies behind you everywhere you go.”
“What’s that supposed to mean?” I snatched the chips from Levi and helped myself.
“Your last serious relationship was when? Oh, right. Never,” Gage said.
“I’ve had serious relationships.”
Levi snorted and stole the chips back.
“No, you haven’t,” Gage insisted. “And now you think it’s okay to fuck around with a romance writer. A woman who writes happily ever afters for a living. A woman who is single-handedly propping up our business right now.”
I stepped into my brother’s personal space and bumped his chest with mine. “I’m not fucking around with her.”
“Oh, so you’ve got real feelings then?” he taunted.
“No.”
“I wish I could beat you into a coma with that ego of yours.”
“Try it, Gigi.”
Levi shoved his arm between us. “Knock it the fuck off. We’re out of Band-Aids.”
We were distracted by the arrival of another pickup truck in front of the house.
“Shit,” I muttered as Dad got out, followed by Bentley the trusty beagle. Bentley made a beeline for Hazel’s overgrown salvia and relieved himself with enthusiasm.
