Page 222 of Story of My Life
Mom shook her head. “I don’t think he does. So I’m gonna drop the hammer. You came back here full of guilt, delusionally thinking if you’d stuck around you could have prevented Laura’s accident.”
“There’s nothing delusional about it. I would have been the one running with her. We would have been out earlier because that’s when we always worked out together. That car never would have?—”
“That’s just really fucking stupid.”
“Language, Mother.”
“Well, I’m sorry, but dropping the hammer doesn’t work if you soften it up. You watched Laura grieve Miller, her physical abilities, and her old life. You had a front-row seat to it just like the rest of us, and you think by pushing Hazel away, you’ll save yourself from that kind of pain. But that’s just really?—”
“Fucking stupid,” my dad filled in.
“Is there an echo in here?”
“Look at your sister,” Mom said, ignoring me. “She went through the kind of trauma that takes some people under and never lets them surface again. But she was laughing her ass off on Labor Day. She’s got the kids, she’s got us, she’s got this town. And when all of you dummies finally sit down to talk, you’ll realize she’s ready to go back to work.”
Dad and I both shot Mom the same confused look. She rolled her eyes. “Do I need to spell everything out for you stubborn pains in my ass?”
Dad and I looked at each other and shrugged. “Well, yeah,” we said.
“Laura is dying to get back to the store. She wants to grow the business. But in order for that to happen, you all have to make it accessible for her, andyouneed to give her the reins to do it.” Mom pointed at Dad for that last bit.
“Why didn’t Laur say anything?” I asked.
“Because your sister is just like the rest of you. She doesn’t know how to ask for help. You think she wants to sit down with you and your brothers and ask you to put in a ramp and a new restroom? You think she wants to be the one to tell Frugal Frank here that we need to hire more staff? She’s expecting you to read her damn mind, just like you’re expecting her to explain in detail what she needs from you.”
Neither of those things had ever happened in the history of the Bishop family…well, unless you counted my mother.
“Well, why didn’t you say so, Pep?” Dad demanded.
Mom threw her hands in the air. “Because I’m not always going to be here to pull your heads out of your asses. You’re all adults, and I am trying to respect that, but geez Louise, do you all make it difficult. This conversation is six months overdue.”
“I should go talk to Larry,” I said, starting to stand again.
“No. You should take a good hard look at your life and realize that you already put all your happiness in one damn basket. You’re only okay as long as your family is okay.”
“Jesus, Mom. You act like you and Dad rented an RV and drove around the country partying till dawn while Laura was in the hospital. I saw you. You suffered right along with her.”
My voice broke, which immediately shut me the fuck up.
Mom sighed and leaned forward to ruffle my hair. “Of course we did. But we didn’t stop living, and neither did your sister. You, on the other hand, haven’t even started.”
“Girlfriends, kids, pets, friends, hobbies, vacations, adventures, new tools. Son, the world is full of things to love. Don’t you think it’s time you try a few of ’em out?” Dad said.
47
SIBLING CONFESSIONS
CAMPBELL
I see we’re still pissed,”I said the next morning at the gym when my sister bared her teeth at me mid–lat pull-down. She already had a full sweat going on, which meant she’d come in earlier than usual. I wondered if that meant she wasn’t sleeping again. Then I wondered if I should ask her if she wasn’t sleeping.
And then I realized I had no idea how to broach the subject without earning her wrath.
“That makes two of us,” Levi announced from the weight bench next to her.
“If you’re gonna be mad at anyone, Shithead here is the one who nominated you, chief,” I pointed out, trading my towel and tumbler for weights.
Levi’s answer was a glare and a grunt before starting his next set of curls.
