Page 38 of A Long Way Back
The way his heart was beating, he doubted it. But had Ink been offering him a get out? He could pretend to be asleep.I don’t want to.He was filled with a mixture of excitement and dread.Christ, he’s offering me a massage, not a fucking blow job.But by the time he was lying face down on the bed with his shoes off, a blow job was all he could think about and his cock was rock hard.
Shit. I’m gay.
Now what?
He wished he’d taken a couple of pills before he lay down. Relax him a bit. Though, he didn’t want to be relaxed. He wanted…Oh fuck. What do I want? Could I pay him? Would that make it easier? Should I go on Grindr? Pay an escort agency?
Don’t be stupid.
His cock deflated.Thank fuck for that.
“Okay?” Ink asked from the door.
Tay turned his head to look at him. He had a towel looped over one arm but his other hand was behind his back.
“What have you got behind your back?”
“A piece of wood for you to bite down on.” Ink held out a rolling pin.
Tay laughed. “I don’t think so.”
“Remember you refused it.” He put it down by the door, then kicked off his shoes and walked over to the bed. “I need you to turn over and sit up so I can do your feet, okay? We’ll start with something easy. I’ve got lotion from the bathroom. Try not to kick me in the face if you freak out.”
Tay rolled onto his back and shuffled up the bed to lean against his pillow.
“Can I take your socks off?”
Tay nodded.
Ink peeled off Tay’s socks then climbed up onto the bed. “I thought touching your feet might not be such a trigger. Pressing inside your big toe and your second toe is supposed to help with headaches. If you can cope with a foot massage, you might be okay with me touching you elsewhere.”
“Such as?”
“Your eyeball?”
Tay laughed, then groaned.
Ink draped the towel across his knees and thighs, squeezed a small amount of lotion onto his fingers, then rubbed his hands together. Tay’s headache vanished, probably suffocated under the tension that had seized the rest of his body.I don’t want to freak out. I want this guy to touch me. Please…please…please don’t let me get a hard on.
At the first touch, Tay sucked in a breath. Ink’s thumbs were in the ball of his foot making circular motions, pressing, and it felt…Oh fuck.It felt good. Tay wanted and didn’t want to shut his eyes. Somehow looking at Ink as he did this, made it more personal. But hehadto watch. Ink ran his tongue over his lip as he stroked from the ball of Tay’s foot to the heel, over and over, and Tay bit back his groan. His mouth went dry and his heart thudded.
“Are you okay?” Ink asked. “How’s the headache?”
“Gone.”
“Fuck! I’ve found something I’m good at and I haven’t touched your toes yet.”
“Don’t stop. It might come back.”
Ink chuckled. “You do know that I have no idea what I’m doing, right? Tell me if something hurts or feels wrong.”
He traced the arch of Tay’s foot with the softest of strokes and Tay knew Ink was looking at him, but now he couldn’t meet his gaze. Ink worked between the bones of Tay’s toes with his fingers and Tay felt himself sinking into the bed, dissolving under his touch. By the time Ink had finished with the other foot, Tay’s ability to hold back his moans of delight had weakened to the point of danger.
Ink lifted Tay’s feet off the towel. “What do you think? Want me to try your back?”
Tay nodded. If he’d saidwant me to fuck you,Tay was pretty sure he’d have kept nodding. He took a deep breath, peeled off his T-shirt and lay face down.
“Sure you don’t want that rolling pin? You could always beat me round the head with it.”
