Page 39 of A Long Way Back
“I’m okay. Is it within reach?”
Ink laughed. “No. I’m not stupid.”
At the first touch of Ink’s hands on his waist, Tay’s cock began to harden again, along with the rest of his body. Even his lungs locked. But not with a dislike of being touched, not with fear. Desire and an anxiety over feeling desire had beaten that to a pulp.
Ink leaned over and whispered, “You’re a bit tense. You need to keep breathing or I’ll worry I’ve killed you.”
Tay took a deep breath and exhaled.
“I knew you could do it.” Ink swept his hands up from the base of Tay’s back, then brought them down the edges of his body. Hard hands on the way up, light touch on the way down. He did it over and over and Tay felt himself melting. All except for one part of him that was most definitely not melting.
“Does it feel okay?” Ink asked. “I’m working with no feedback here. You’re not thinking of diving for the rolling pin, are you? And do not tell me it feels fine orI’lldive for the rolling pin.”
“It feels good.”
“Only good?”
“Great.”
“No better than great?”
“What were you hoping for?”
“I’ve never felt anything so wonderful in my entire life. Said with meaning.”
Tay laughed. But… How did this feel so different to when a physio touched him?
Ink started to work on his shoulders and neck, and a groan finally slipped out.
“Exclamation of pain or pleasure?” Ink asked. “I don’t know you well enough to be sure.”
“I’m not sure either.”Coward.“Maybe both.”Fucking coward.“More pleasure than pain.”Better but not the whole truth.“I’ve never felt anything so wonderful in my entire life.”
Ink gave a loud laugh. “Thank you, Mr Sincerity. Sure you’re not freaking out, but demonstrating amazing self-control?”
“I’m okay.”
He really was. He was still trying to figure out how he’d so easily accepted Ink’s touch when he shied away from everyone else’s. Ink had cared enough to read up how to do this and Tay felt as if his pain and sadness was lifting. But now he had a problem of a different sort. As Ink put pressure on his back, it was pushing Tay’s cock into the bed in a slow rhythm. Lust coiled in his gut, the sensation all too familiar, and his mind kept slipping into thoughts of sex which both excited and alarmed him.
He didn’t want to say stop. He wanted to saydon’tstop.Ask me to turn over and you’ll see what you’re doing to me.But suddenly, Ink’s hands were gone and the mattress shifted as he climbed off the bed.
“I need to take Dog outside,” Ink mumbled. He left the room and closed the door.
Tay groaned and rolled over onto his back. Moments after flipping open his button and unzipping, he had his cock in his hand, Ink’s face in his head, shortly followed by a handful of come spurting over his fingers and stomach.
Fuck! I really am gay.
INK STOOD WITH HIS HEAD resting against Tay’s bedroom door. He shuddered when he heard Tay’s heavy breathing and gulped at the long moan that followed. He’d had a feeling Tay was getting…Fuck.Ink fled to the bathroom and locked the door. He yanked down his jeans and boxers and wrapped his hand around his cock. Just a few hard strokes were needed before lightning bit the back of his skull and raced down his spine, igniting his balls. He sank his teeth into his lip to stop himself from crying out as he soaked his hand.
Did this complicate matters?Of course it fucking does.
When his breathing had calmed, he cleaned himself up and refastened his jeans. The truth was, he liked Tay more than he should and that was dangerous.
THE FOLLOWING MORNING, INK WAS a little anxious about how Tay would behave after last night. Tay didn’t know Ink had heard him jack off, nor did he know Ink had done the same, but had he sensed what Ink had felt between them? Some connection? One of those one-in-a-million moments when you look at a person and they look at you and you know there’s something between you, followed by the excitement of anticipating what was to come? Ink understood what that meant now. But had Tay felt it too?Is it even real?
This was new territory. He kept his emotions under lock and key for his own safety. He’d never felt anything for a guy he’d hooked up with. He couldn’t afford to. Not that there’d been many when money hadn’t been involved. For those guys who’d paid him, he felt nothing except for relief when they’d zipped up and left.
While he’d been locked up, he’d kept his sexuality locked up too. Now, he no longer needed to, but any relationship he embarked on would be built on a falsehood and that wasn’t right. But what choice was there? If he wanted to start something with Tay, assuming Tay felt the same, he could never tell him the truth. If they married, had kids, lived happily ever after, and died within days of each other, that secret had to stay safe. But Ink would worry every day that the truth would emerge. So he shouldn’t, couldn’t, wouldn’t start anything. Which had been the reason he’d done the right thing last night and left the bedroom.
