Page 129 of A Long Way Back
“Want to change the dressings on my back, doctor? I got them wet in the shower.”
“You’re not supposed to have wet your back.”
“Maybe I don’t need the wounds covered anymore.”
Tay took off the dressings and inspected his back. “They look okay. Not bleeding or anything. Want to leave the dressings off and see how you go?”
“Okay.”
“We’re going to the beach. With a picnic. It’s too nice a day to be indoors. Dog can come too. The beach is dog-friendly all year round. You want to make the sandwiches while I find the pop-up tent and a blanket?”
“Are my pink swimming trunks going to clash with my hair?”
“They’ll tone beautifully.”
BY THE TIME THE THREE of them were settled on Beadnell beach, Tay was shattered. He lay on the blanket in front of the pop-up tent in which Dog had settled and sighed at the feel of the sun on his face. His head ached, his legs ached. All of him ached. Not so long ago, he’d have reached for the codeine. If he’d had any… If Ink hadn’t been with him… Maybe. He wondered if he ought to ask Ink to get rid of the codeine the hospital had given him. Addiction wasn’t something you could shrug off like a summer cold. He shuddered when he thought how close he’d come to wrecking his life.
“This is lovely,” Ink said. “But don’t burn. Use the sun spray.”
“Will you spray me and rub it in?”
“Sure that won’t lead to you frightening small children and dogs?”
Tay laughed. “Probably, but I don’t care.”
He sighed as Ink sprayed him, then rubbed the liquid in.
“You look tired.” Ink sprayed his own arms and legs.
“It was worth it to get here. If I could walk further, I’d take you to one of my favourite beaches. We might have had it to ourselves, but a crutch and soft sand don’t work.”
“This is… This is…” Ink released a stuttering breath.
Tay turned to look at him.
Ink rubbed the spray on his face, then released a shaky breath. “Beautiful. Restful. Calming. And… I feel safe.”
Tay reached for his hand and squeezed his fingers.
Ink lay down at his side. “I can’t remember when I last felt as safe as this. I usually have a few days of feeling okay when I move to a new area, but this is different. And I know I’m not really safe, but Ifeelit.”
“I want you to feel more than safe. I don’t want feeling safe to be something you even have to think about. I wonder if we could find a way to get you a new identity.”
“It would cost a lot of money.”
“My dad has a lot of money.”
Ink sucked in a breath. “It wouldn’t be legal, so getting caught would always be a possibility. I don’t want your father to get into trouble and you’d have to tell him why you needed the money. I suppose you could say you wanted a penis extension.”
Tay growled and Ink grinned, but the grin fell away.
“I don’t… I don’t want him and your mum to look at me and wonder if I did it.”
“They’ll believe you.”
Ink sighed. “They won’t. I wouldn’t blame them. The jury was unanimous and there’s no new evidence. Your parents were just the sort of people who were on the jury. Good honest citizens appalled by how a child could kill another child. His brother. I know you’d like to think your mum and dad would take my side, but you can’t tell them. You can’t tell anyone.”
“I could borrow the money.”
