Page 23 of Inbetweeners
“I’m sorry this happened to you, Charlie,” Emmett whispered. “I hope you take good memories with you on your final journey. Memories are everything. Think of what made you happy. Cling onto that.”
Was that Emmett wishing he’d made a different choice? It should be. He was an idiot.
“Tell the police that I owed Barry Monahan money. He might have sent the guy to stab me. I don’t want Barry to go after my family for what I owe. Tell them I love them.”
“Okay,” Emmett said. “Good luck, Charlie.”
“I can feel something pulling me,” the guy whispered. “Bye then, I guess.” He took a step forward, his hands slipped from theirs and he disappeared.
“Well, that was easy,” Nix said. “I thought we’d see a bright light or a tunnel or someone with a halo holding a list of names.”
Emmett stared at his fingers and shivered.
“What’s wrong?”
“I don’t feel… I need to wash my hand.”
“Are you a germaphobe or something?”
“No, but…” Emmett leaned over and threw up.
Nix rolled his eyes. “Sit down. I’ll get you a drink.” He hurried across the road into a small shop and bought a bottle of water and a pack of baby wipes. He thought about buying condoms and lube, but maybe now wasn’t the time.
Emmett was shaking too much to open the packet so Nix did it. Once he’d wiped his hands and face, rinsed his mouth and had a drink, some colour came back to his complexion.
“That was kind of you,” Emmett said.
“For fuck’s sake don’t tell anyone. I’ll lose my demon card.”
Emmett huffed.
“Are you going to throw up every time we do this? Because you need to carry water and wipes with you. You can’t expect me to fork out for them every time.”
“And your moment of kindness has passed.”
“What moment of kindness? I just don’t want you stinking of puke.”
Emmett swallowed more water. “I just felt as though everything was draining out of me. It was so weird. Didn’t you feel anything?”
“Relief he’d gone.”
“You’re full of empathy, aren’t you?” Emmett stood up. “Let’s go and talk to the police.”
“Hang on a minute. How can we tell them what happened without getting involved?”
“Ah yeah. You’re right.”
Nix grinned. “Can I have that in writing? Now?Nix is right.I might frame it. Iwillframe it. It can sit on your bedside table. Shall I get a picture of me too? Maybe my dick.”
“Fuck off.”
“For an angel, you have a filthy mouth.”
“I’m making up for not being allowed to swear in Heaven.”
“You couldn’t swear? What happened if you did?”
“I just couldn’t.”
