Page 66 of Everything That Kills Me
“You could find out.”
It was as though the last three years hadn’t happened. Zeph’s longing flooded back, overwhelming his anger, overpowering him like a storm surge. He moved so slowly, it was as if he’dbeen caught in some slow-motion film, but then his lips finally met Jack’s and brushed against them. The sensation was feather-soft yet he felt it in every cell of his body. Zeph took a step back and they both exhaled shakily.
“Forgotten how to kiss?” Jack asked.
“It’s been a long while.” Something curled in Zeph’s stomach at the confession. He wished he’d not said it. Before he could start wondering how many partners Jack had kissed and walked away from, Jack pulled him in, crushing their lips together. The effect was instantaneous, water falling onto phosphorous, and Zeph caught fire. The scent of Jack, the taste of him, the feel of him, Zeph wanted it all. Jack’s hand was at the back of Zeph’s head, cupping his nape, holding him in place while Zeph clung to Jack’s T-shirt. The kiss started as a desperate mess of lips and tongues, then gradually slowed and morphed to something very different, more caring, filled with wonder as they explored each other’s mouth.
Even as Zeph curled his tongue around Jack’s he wondered what he was doing.Jack would leave again. That knowledge sat in his core. But if this was all he could have, Zeph still wanted it.
Their bodies stayed pressed together and Jack’s hands were now on Zeph’s backside, keeping him in place. The sound Jack made in his throat flicked more heat into Zeph’s stomach. When they broke for air, Jack lifted his head and said, “It’s been a long while for me too. I’ve never forgotten your kisses. We were good at this.”
Zeph wanted to cry.
Jack pushed him back to the wall and kissed him again, rocking against him.Oh God, my cock.In some distant part of Zeph’s brain, those few cells not overcome with lust were telling him to stop before he came in his trousers.Stophovered in his head but the word was lost in the mind-numbing pleasure ofwhat they were doing. Why stop when this felt so good, so right, so perfect?
When Jack pulled back, Zeph’s heart lurched, but he was only removing his T-shirt. Zeph widened his eyes at Jack’s body. He’d been fit before, now he was ripped, though there were scars on his arms and chest. Jack slowly unfastened the buttons on Zeph’s shirt.
“You’ve grown muscles,” Jack whispered.
The way Jack looked at him made Zeph gulp. They couldn’t stop touching each other. At least, Zeph couldn’t. He ran his fingers over Jack’s arms, his chest, his face. It was as if he had to keep convincing himself that he was really here, not a figment of his imagination. When Zeph felt the grind of Jack’s dick against his, he groaned. Jack’s tongue was deep in his mouth as he bucked against him.
I don’t know you anymore. I don’t know anything about you. What you do, where you live. Why you’re here.
But Zeph could feel Jack’s desire, and at that moment, it made him happy.
Eighteen
This wasn’t what Jack had planned. To be halfway to fucking Zeph against the wall. He’d just wanted to see him as he had on previous visits to Cambridge. Not that Zeph had seen him. Jack had secretly watched him for a while, then walked away again. But the last job he’d done had almost resulted in his death and he’d promised himself that if he survived, he’d actually talk to Zeph.
Now he was in his arms, moulded against him, bare chest to bare chest, and Zeph felt so warm and soft—most of him—and he smelled familiar. And yes, Jack was being a selfish bastard pushing him into this, but he couldn’t help it. He needed Zeph to stop him, to slow him down, except Zeph was writhing against him, angling his hips to get more pressure on their dicks and moaning in a way that overwhelmed Jack’s resolution.
His hands somehow found their way into the back of Zeph’s trousers, his palms slipping inside underwear to fondle his arse. Firm and smooth and…oh fuck.Zeph was groaning into his mouth, muttering words Jack could only partly make sense of. Butyeswas in there. A lot ofyeses.
It might not be what Jack had planned but it wasn’t difficult to give in to temptation. He brought his hands out of Zeph’s trousers so he could unfasten them. A moment later, they were around his ankles along with his shorts, and Zeph stepped free. Jack liked that Zeph didn’t try to cover himself. Not that he needed to. But this was the first time Jack had seen him completely naked. Zeph was narrow waisted with slim hips, but more muscled than when Jack last saw him. Jack was mesmerised. There was a pale scar on his leg and he wondered where that had come from, but he was still gorgeous. His body was gracefully lean, a dark treasure trail leading to his cock,which jutted up from a neatly trimmed patch of dark hair, his balls drawn up tight beneath.
“If you keep looking at me like that, I can’t be held responsible for my dick’s reaction,” Zeph whispered.
Jack peeled off his own clothes, took Zeph’s hand and tugged him over to the bed. They lay down on their sides facing each other. Jack ran his hand from Zeph’s shoulder, down the side of his body, into the dip of his waist, along the curve of his hip and over his thigh. He still could hardly believe he was doing this, touching him. Then Zeph put his hand on him, doing the same as he’d just done, and Jackfelt it as a molten wave sweeping over and through hisbody.
“I’m not going to last,” Zeph told him.
“You think I will?”
Zeph leaned forward to press his lips to Jack’s and their cocks kissed too, slick heads brushing together, and they gasped into each other’s mouth. Kissing him was like falling into a warm sea, being caught in a rainstorm, feeling snow settle on his face. Everything that Jack loved. When they parted, Zeph’s breathing was ragged, the unsteady tremor of his exhalations making Jack’s heart thump.
“More,” Zeph pleaded, his eyes heavy-lidded with lust. “Please.”
Jack pulled Zeph in so their cocks pressed together and Zeph bit his lip. Jack spat into his palm, enveloped both their lengths in his hand and they groaned at the same time. It was all he could do not to come before he took another breath.When did I last take one?The feel of his cock against Zeph’s, the heat of it, the way they were both leaking precome… It all blew his mind. As he began to drag his fist up and down, Zeph arched his back, clenched his fingers on Jack’s hip bone and thrust into his grip.
“Yes!” Zeph gasped.
When he felt Zeph’s fingers slide from his hip into the seam of his arse, Jack tensed, then bucked against him. They were both damp with sweat, bodies meshed together in every way they could manage. Jack kept jacking them off while their lips stayed fused. His hand was wet now, their dicks slipping in his fingers. Jack had to keep going, climbing the mountain, surfing the wave, his hand moving faster and faster. But this was whole body fucking, his leg wrapped over Zeph’s hip, their bellies together, his other hand on Zeph’s shoulder, holding him in place.
It was Zeph who came first, struggling to stifle his cry as he erupted between them. Jack watched as he shifted from wire-tight to liquid-soft, his eyelids fluttering, his head tipped back, his tongue resting on his upper lip before he gave a long sigh and smiled. Jack had never been more turned on in his life. He tightened his fingers around his own cock and came a moment later in a flash of white-hot pleasure, with a loud strangled cry.
He’d never come so hard. He wasn’t sure it would ever feel like that again. From when he’d first seen Zeph to now had been like some extended foreplay leading to this moment. He rolled onto his back, his chest heaving, his eyes closed. And they hadn’t even fucked.Ha.He felt Zeph move from the bed. When he came back, a warm wet cloth passed across Jack’s stomach, then over his hand, cleaning his fingers one by one. Jack didn’t deserve that kindness.
Zeph fell asleep curled up against him, and Jack couldn’t move and wake him because questions would come, so he stayed still and stared at him, memorising everything about him for the time when this couldn’t happen. It shouldn’t have happened but there was no point in regrets.
