Page 98 of Everything That Kills Me
“Then that’s exactly what we’ll do.”
Jack left Zeph taking his clothes off by the pool and went inside to get some towels. He hoped the water was warm. Benoît would have put the pool heater on but whether there’d been time for the water to warm up, Jack wasn’t sure. When he came back out, minus his clothes, Zeph was swimming up and down and not yelping so Jack assumed the water was fine.
He dived in and came up at Zeph’s side. Perfect temperature.
Zeph stopped swimming and glared at him. “How did you know the water was deep enough to dive into!”
Shit.“I researched the place, remember? Two and half metres at this end.”
Zeph swam over, wrapped his arms and legs around him and took him down.
Jack had never had fun like this, chasing, playfighting, snatching kisses. He wanted to buy Zeph an inflatable shark and leave it in the pool for him to find. Maybe he should put it in bed. He liked making him laugh. Jack made Thomas laugh sometimes but this was different. Zeph made him different.Jack wanted as long with him as he could get. He wasn’t going to think about it ending, even though he knew it had to.
The next day, they drove eight kilometres to explore Léon with its pretty brick and half-timbered houses. They bought fresh fruit and vegetables from the market: chunky tomatoes, curly cucumbers, oranges, apples, grapes, bundles of salad… While they drank panachés, half pint glasses filled with beer and lemonade, they sat and watched the world go by, though Jack found himself watching Zeph because he was far more fascinating.
Could I have ever been like him?It wouldn’t have happened if his parents had lived. They’d probably have killed him. Or sold him. Thomas had offered him the only chance of a future. Brought him up in the only way he knew and though sometimes Jack regretted that, he knew he was lucky. He still remembered his father’s threats.Wet your bed again and we’ll send you to an orphanage. They never let children like you outside. They’ll tie you to the wall. Whip you every day.Thomas had saved him.
Jack bought them flip-flops and board shorts, along with straw hats. Zeph purchased matching short-sleeved pink shirts. No inflatable sharks to be seen. Jack considered ordering one online but knew what Thomas would say about leaving a trail withanyname, particularly for something so frivolous, and decided not to.
When they got back to the house, Jack adjusted the bike he usually used so Zeph could straddle it with his feet flat on the ground. Then he fastened the helmet under Zeph’s chin.
“Just in case.”
“I bet you think I’m such a loser not being able to ride,” Zeph muttered. “It was a combination of me being ill, then my mum being overprotective. Added to it being too dangerous to cyclewhere we lived and so a bike was never bought. The moment passed and I wasn’t bothered. Until now.”
“You’ll get it. Walk the bike along like that. Squeeze the brakes so you get a feel for how they stop the wheel.”
Zeph set off on the path outside the front of the house.
“Now go a little faster,” Jack told him. “Keep your head up, your weight on the saddle. What you need to do is balance. Don’t worry about the pedals. Scoot.”
Zeph was gripping the handle bars so tightly his knuckles were white but he was traveling without putting his feet down or braking.
“Excellent. Now the road.”
Zeph came to a halt and shot him a look of horror.
“No one is using this road except us. You’ll be fine.” Jack set the pedal at the right position and stepped back. “What you’re going to do is press down and get the bike moving before you put your other foot on. Okay?”
“Okay.”
“Balancing at low speed is hard. The faster you go, the easier it is. Bring your other foot up without looking down. Keep staring straight ahead. I’ll hold the back of the bike for a little while. Give it a try.”
Jack hardly needed to hold the saddle. Zeph wobbled but he got it almost immediately. Jack stopped running after him and watched. The further he went, the more confident he became. Zeph came to a halt, turned the bike by moving it round with his feet and then set off again. By the time he reached Jack, his delight was clear.
“Where do I sign up for the Tour De France?” Zeph asked as he rode past. “I didn’t even fall off!”
When Zeph had had enough, the bike and helmet went back into the garage.
“You’re a quick learner,” Jack said.
“You’re a good teacher. Surfing next!”
They set off for the beach in flip-flops, swim shorts and rash guards, carrying surfboards, towels, books, water and suntan lotion. When he and Thomas had surfed here, they’d carried their boards to the sea, spent a couple of hours in the water, then come back to the house. Zeph wanted to sit in the sun and read.
“So…” Zeph said. “I’ll learn to surf first, then later I can tackle kite surfing. Though maybe I should leave that until it’s less windy.”
“There’s hardly any wind.”
