Page 78 of Light Up
“I’m not an addict. I’m gay.” Corey felt bad saying that because he didn’t think his uncle had a significant issue with it but he knew the social worker would accept that as a reason for him to be turned away.
“What sort of work did you do?”
“Waiter in an Italian restaurant. I could do more of that or clean. I’ll find something.”
“You need to rest and get better first. You’re not fit for work. You’re entitled to sickness benefit. The YMCA is a great place to recuperate. I think you’ll fit right in.”
“Thank you.”
Corey was lucky to have a place to stay. He knew that. Except he didn’t feel lucky. From the moment he’d been accused of stealing that wallet, his life had been turned upside down. Ina bad way, then in a good, except the good part had mostly never existed.
He hadn’t yet been discharged. Apparently, they were waiting for his prescription painkillers to arrive. Corey left his things by the chair and took the polar bear and a Mick Herron book across the hallway. Not easy when he was using crutches. He’d hoped Tal would be awake, but he wasn’t. He put the bear on the bedside table next to the water glass and sat down.
Maybe it was time to draw a line under this. The likelihood of Tal remembering the hotel and the rest was zero because Corey had clearly just had an elaborate concussion-induced, ultra-vivid dream. Even in that dream, Tal had never given him any indication he wanted Corey in his life, long term. The chance encounter had lasted a few days or a few hours depending on what he believed. Corey would let this go but he’d stay at Tal’s bedside as long as he could just in case he woke up.
Corey started to readSlow Horsesout loud. “This is how River Cartwright slipped off the fast track and joined the slow horses.”
He’d already read most of it, but if some part of Tal was taking this in, it was a bit mean to begin later in the book.
He was three chapters in and his voice was husky when he heard someone snap, “What the hell?”
Corey looked up to see Louis striding towards him, Benjamin on his heels.
“I said you weren’t allowed to visit him,” Louis said.
Corey’s lungs seized up. “But I haven’t done anything to hurt him.”
“Fuck off,” Louis muttered. “You’re not good for him. Telling him lies, saying you pulled him out of his car.”
“I’m not lying. I’m just reading to him.”
“Well don’t. Leave him alone.”
“That’s up to Tal.” Corey pushed to his feet and retrieved his crutches. “Not you. Why are you being so mean?”
Louis’ eyes glittered. “Because I recognise a con artist when I see one. You think there’s money in this. There isn’t. Get the fuck out of here before I call security.”
“What’s…going…on?”
The voice from the bed had them all spinning round.
“Tal!” Louis knocked into Corey as he took hold of Tal’s hand. Corey cried out in pain and clutched himself. It was Benjamin who took Corey’s elbow and steadied him, mouthedsorry.
“You okay?” Benjaminasked.
Corey nodded. But no, he wasn’t. His heart was in pieces.
Louis was all over Tal. “You’re in hospital. You’ve been asleep long enough, darling. Time to rejoin the living. You don’t want Mojo to get his professional hands on you.”
Louis sounded completely different now, kind and concerned.
Tal looked among the three of them and Corey waited for the spark of recognition when Tal looked at him, but it didn’t come.Oh God. It didn’t come.
When Tal finally stared straight at him, he frowned. “Who are you?”
Corey didn’t wait to be told to leave. There was no point. “I’m glad you’re awake,” he said quietly and walked back to his ward, feeling as if the whole world had gone dark.
Well, now he knew. Louis was right. He wasn’t good for Tal. He didn’t deserve him. He’d pretended to himself that he did, that if he found the right sort of guy, then they could both be happy. But Corey should have known better. He didn’t deserve happiness. Not after what happened to Raj and Gabe. His fault. Something he could never get over andshouldnever get over. Something he couldn’t even bear to think about.
