Page 13 of The Top of Admiration
Chapter 11: Miranda — Moonwalkers
Misery acquaints a man with strange bedfellows.
The Tempest, William Shakespeare
I sat in my car, not wanting to enter the house. I’d just sit in the driveway for a bit. I was so close to losing it and I didn’t want to do it in front of Lucy or Cordy. They’d been so supportive tonight and paying them back with tears didn’t seem right. I would spend the next few minutes out here pulling myself together. Then, I’d go inside and celebrate with my girls.
Cam hadn’t shown up tonight. Well, one Cam had. And he’d brought an incredibly thoughtful gift with him. I felt the soft cover of the sketchbook as I thought about the night.
Bad Cam, as I was beginning to call him myself, just didn’t show. No text. No call. Just ghosted me on one of the most important nights of my life. Part of me was glad that he stayed away. It minimized the chances of him humiliating me in front of Leticia and the local art community, but it stung. I’d be humiliated every day of the week if it meant I felt seen by him.
My phone buzzed.
Cam: Sorry babe. We got home in time, but so much shit happening with Jess’s brother right now. Got caught vandalizing school gym. She’s a mess. Hope it went well. Will come over tomorrow after work.
Whatever strength I had earlier left me, and I burst into tears. Not pretty tears. Big, ugly, gulpy tears. Snotty tears. He’d abandoned me for ‘just a friend,’ wheelie-shoe Jess. I don’t know how long I sobbed for, but it was a while. I tried to remember thelast time I cried, and I couldn’t. I think it was Grandpa Harold’s funeral, but even then, they were sedate tears. The tears you shed when you say farewell to someone who lived a full life but whose absence you would always feel.
I heard a muffled voice but ignored it. Peggy and Reg, our meddling elderly neighbors, were probably out scaring cats away. My door opened and I felt the cool air rush in.
“Miranda, are you okay?” I didn’t look up. That deep, calm voice belonged to Good Cam, and I didn’t want anyone to see me like this, let alone someone who wasn’t a close friend. Someone who had been so kind to me tonight even when my own boyfriend left me unsupported and alone. I looked stupid. Like a doormat.
He leaned across me and unclicked my seatbelt, pulling me up and out of the car. The sketchbook dropped on my seat, and I broke away from him to grab it.
“No, just let me get it.” My voice was strained and interrupted by hiccups.
“You can grab it, it’s okay.” I picked up the sketch book and continued facing the car, putting my back to Cam.
He put his hands on my shoulders and physically turned me to him, pulling me into a firm hug.
“It’s alright, just keep crying if you need to.” So I did. I just stood there crying in Good Cam’s arms.
He didn’t say anything more. He just held me firmly in place with one arm and clasped his other hand to the back of my head, pushing it against his chest. Fuck, I could keep crying for a century here. It felt safe and warm.
Eventually, I pulled away, wiping my eyes.
“I’m sorry. Tonight was just … Cam never came. He was caught up in Jess’s family issues.”
“Ah, the bitchy moonwalker huh?” His eyes were gentle and sad, mirroring the sorrow in my own.
“That’s her. Anyway, I’m sorry and thank you. For everything. For the book and being nice to me.”
“Any time, Miranda. I’m really sorry that your night ended like this. You deserved a happy night. Everyone is so proud of you. I hope you know that.”
“Yep, I know. I’m very lucky.” I forced a smile. “I’m heading inside. I think a hot shower and bed are in my very near future.”
He smiled sadly and rubbed my back. “Damon just sent me out for more beer. Stay up; I’ll be back soon.”
I smiled back and headed inside, where Lucy greeted me with a bottle of champagne.
“She’s here! All hail the professional artist!” She punctuated the statement with the popping of the champagne cork.
Cordy stepped closer, grabbing my arm. “Why is your make-up all fucked up?”
I was all cried out, so my voice came out small and full of defeat.
“Cam texted me. The reason he didn’t come is that Jess’s brother had problems and she was upset.”
“That motherfucker,” Cordy spat.
