Page 17 of The Top of Admiration
He put his hands on his knees as though he was going to stand and leave, but changed direction at the last minute, grabbing me in a ferocious hug.
“I love you, Randa. I’m sorry. I hate this. I wish I could take back time and be there last night.” His voice sounded jagged and raspy.
“It’s not just last night Cam. You know that as well as I do. You’re a fun guy, a good guy. You’re just not the guy for me.” I returned his hug, though with less bone-crushing strength than he was using.
He walked out the door without saying a word. I should cry. Cordelia cried for weeks over Harrison, to the point where shelooked like a swollen baby piglet. But I couldn’t. I knew the writing had been on the wall for some time and rather than feeling sad, I felt relieved. I did love Cam, but I honestly don’t know if it was in a true “boyfriend” way. I loved his company, and he was fun in bed, but if he’d cheated the way Harrison had, I think I’d have just walked away angry that I’d been betrayed, but not upset that I’d lost him.
I texted the Bard Bitches.
Me: Just broke up with Cam officially.
Jules: Chin up little sis. You’ve got us! Now you can go to the retreat.
Cordy: More wine tonight?
Me: Jules, I’ll think about it. Cordy, hell no. I’m dying from last night’s adventures.
I grabbed Cordy’s laptop and logged onto my email. Letty sent the application weeks ago. Was I too late? I scanned the terms and conditions. I had two days to apply. I spent the next two hours filling out the forms and attaching samples of my work.
I liked being busy and having a mission. Lyon, here I come (hopefully!).
Chapter 14: Miranda — Neve Reynolds
Hide not thy poison with such sugared words
Henry VI, William Shakespeare
It was a month later and I could barely contain myself. The scholarship announcements were supposed to come out yesterday and I hadn’t heard anything. Letty shushed me at work today when I suggested that I had been rejected. “Nonsense, Miranda. I checked with Lucas. They send both rejections and approvals on the same day. They’re just late. The chair of the scholarship committee is Neve Reynolds; what did you expect?”
Neve Reynolds was Letty’s nemesis. I have no idea why, but they had beef that went way back apparently. The art world could be surprisingly bitchy.
I kept checking my phone every few minutes, which was driving Cordy nuts. We were sitting around enjoying a “picky dinner.” We called it that to make it sound like an actual thing, rather than just us eating cheese, biscuits, and dip for dinner. Bad Cam was here for some reason. He dropped in a few times a week, insisting that “friends” did that. I could see he was upset, so I let him hang around.
“Randa, I can’t watch this any longer. I’m going next door. Call me the moment you hear anything!” Cordelia was never good with suspense. She was the kind of person to read a mystery thriller and turn to the back few pages after reading only the first few chapters.
“Chicken,” I laughed. She’d barely left when she ran back.
“Nettie’s run off. She won’t come back to Damon calling her. Randa, please bring out some ham and we’ll lure her back.”
Nettie was a good girl most of the time, but sometimes adventure called and she was helpless to say no. I actually saw a fair bit of myself in her.
“I can do it!” Cam offered. He was the perfect friend lately. Always wanting to do things for me, always wanting to pay, which I obviously declined.
“Nah, I got it.” I grabbed the ham and ran outside.
“Damon Bentley, this is very disappointing. I had thought better of you.” Peggy was out the front of her house watching Nettie run from Damon and Cordy, who approached her from different directions. I ignored Peggy. She wasn’t a bad old stick, but she could be really annoying.
“Nets, baby! Auntie Miranda has some ham! Oooh, look at this ham.” I flashed the ham around, catching Nettie’s interest. She rushed over and swallowed it without chewing, allowing me to grab her collar.
“Thanks,” Damon grunted, lugging the reluctant Labrador toward his house, with Cordy following. When I made it back into the house, Cam was cleaning the kitchen. Ok, that was it. He never cleaned. This was some kind of redemption attempt, and I’d told him so many times over the last month that there was zero chance of us getting back together.
“Cam, why are you cleaning?”
“I’m just trying to make your life more comfortable. I love you.”
I sighed. I had to just cut him out. This was painful. “Cam, we are done. I don’t think we can be friends for a while.”
This French retreat, if I was accepted, would be perfect. Three months away would help Cam stand on his own two feet. Maybeeven find a new girl. That thought didn’t hurt me, though the fact that I wasn’t unbothered by him moving on didn’t surprise me.
