Page 16 of Rock the Cradle of Love
Noah takes another breath and more color rises on his cheeks. “My…junk works. I can, uh, masturbate, get hard, and come. It’s just not accompanied by what I’m told are a lot of heightened physical feelings.”
“Okay,” Taylor says again, for lack of knowing what else to say. Bizarre is the only way to describe this conversation. Never in a million years would he have imagined having a conversation like this with another dude. Hell, with anyone.
“It’s hard to understand, I know, because sex sells and sex makes the world go round. And it all makes sense to those of you with a libido.”
Taylor’s brain is whirling. He’s not quite sure what to ask now. He’d wanted to find out if there’s a chance they could be together, but he’s still as in the dark as he was two minutes ago, before he opened his mouth. “If most the of population likes sex and you don’t…”
Noah’s eyebrow quirks.
“…get aroused like most of the rest of us, how does that work? I mean, have you ever had sex?” Taylor claps a hand over his mouth. “I’m sorry. That’s none of my business.”
Noah sets his beer on the table and shifts in his seat so he’s fully facing Taylor.
“I think what you want to know is if I’d be interested in exploring a relationship with you?”
“That was my original intent, yes. But I’m a guy who likes sex. A lot. And you’ve just told me… Hell. I don’t even know what you told me, really.” Taylor takes a long swig from his bottle, hoping to swallow or drown his confusion with beer. Right…a guy who loves sex in a relationship with a guy who seems to have no urges whatsoever. How’s that even supposed to work? A small part of Taylor thinks this is a mistake, thinks he should have kept his fucking trap shut. But the bigger part of him knows it’s better this way. Even if there’s no chance, he was honest. Noah knows how Taylor feels, and Taylor can’t help but think that’s a good thing. He’ll assure Noah that he’ll get over it and move on. He’ll sign up on a dating website and meet people during the summer. He’ll have a lot of sex and get over Noah. Come pre-season, everything will be fine.
Noah’s snapping fingers bring Taylor out of his thoughts. He blinks and meets Noah’s gaze.
Noah smiles and waves his fingers between them. “This here, what we’re doing, it’s called communicating.”
Taylor rolls his eyes, but smirks.
“Communication is a good thing.” Noah takes a drink of his beer too. “Okay, so, yes. I’m interested. That is, if I haven’t turned you off because of my asexuality.”
“Yeah?” Taylor’s stomach loops as if he’s riding the Shock Wave at Six Flags.
“Yeah.”
But can they make it work? “I… That’s great. But how’s that even going to work?” He scratches his head.
“Well, being asexual doesn’t mean I don’t feel emotions. It doesn’t mean I don’t need love and affection just like everyone else. It just means that when it comes to sex…well, I’m not sure what it means, to be honest.” He takes a drink of his beer and then takes a breath. “I’ve had sex a couple of times because I wanted to know what it was all about, but the person I had sex with wasn’t someone I had an emotional investment in.” Noah holds up a hand. “Don’t get me wrong, it was consensual, and the girl had all the details to make an informed decision. Steve and Marisol taught informed consent more than almost anything.”
Taylor shakes his head. It’s a lot. So he grabs the easy question. “Who are Steve and Marisol?”
“My billet family when I played juniors in Nebraska.”
“Wow, that’s not your standard birds and bees talk.”
Noah chuckles and shakes his head. “No, it wasn’t. Marisol teaches gender studies at UNL, so all their kids, including me, got the expanded edition.” Noah smiles and Taylor’s heart lurches. As Noah talks, things fall into place. How he doesn’t always get the sexual innuendos that fly around the locker room. Why he always maintains distance between himself and the women he dances with at clubs when the team goes out. Why he’s never had a girlfriend in all the years Taylor’s known him.
Taylor feels about Noah the same as he ever did, but he’ still not sure about the sex part. And if Noah doesn’t know, then how will they—
“One day at a time, okay?” Noah says as if reading Taylor’s mind. “No, we’re probably not going to fall into bed right away like other people might, if you can deal with that, but I like holding hands and I like being close.”
Noah hooks Taylor’s pinky with his own and Taylor’s breath fuckin’ catches. Wow. Close he can do. Maybe he’s found the one person who’s going to be willing to put up with his over-affectionate nature.
“We’ll figure out everything else as we go, all right? I get that I’m a square peg in a round hole, but never be afraid to tell me you want something, okay? Those things really don’t occur to me. But I’m willing to try probably just about anything.”
Taylor just looks at him, wide-eyed.
“Okay?”
“Yeah.” Taylor nods. If Noah’s willing to give it a go, he should be too. “Okay. Can I kiss you now?”
Noah smiles, eyes crinkling at the corner. “I’d like that.”
Taylor’s a goner. He scoots closer. Their lips meet in a slow slide. It’s soft and gentle and Taylor wants more, God does he want more. He wants to climb onto Noah’s lap and yank off his shirt and touch him everywhere. Two years of fucking pining will do that. But Noah doesn’t feel things that way and is a virgin for all intents and purposes. So Taylor stays where he’s at, but runs his tongue along Noah’s bottom lip. Noah gasps and his lips part.
