Page 118 of The Eyes of Tamburah
“I told the truth, the prince changed the plan. You were taking too long and we were getting close to discovering the Invisible Sword’s hideout on our own. He ordered you arrested.”
“So when you disobeyed…”
“A calculated risk.”
“You still wanted The Eyes and the Invisible Sword at that time.”
“Yes. I hoped the prince would be happy about a successful mission and I could convince him to allow Banqui to live and for you return to your old life.”
“Why would you do that?”
He stared at her. “You know why.”
She almost growled at him. Why couldn’t anyone give her a straight answer? Ignoring his comment, she continued, “And then we were ambushed.”
“We got too close. I’d hoped we’d reach the monastery before the Invisible Sword had time to organize an offensive.” He rolled his shoulder as if it pained him. “That mistake should have killed me.”
And despite everything, she was glad that it didn’t. “Why are you still here? Before I left, you acted like you planned on going to Apanji.”
Rendor set the tablet down. “When I was lying in the desert waiting for death, I considered my life. Nothing to be proud of. No one to grieve for me. Rather the opposite. I fully expected the sand to open up underneath me and suck my soul down into the seven caverns of hell. Then…” His gaze grew distant. “I was given a second chance.”
Rendor stood. The big man moved with a fluid grace. Most people struggled to disentangle from a sleeping cushion. Standing, he was intimidating and she resisted the urge to step back when he drew closer to her.
“I meant what I said before you left on that mission—I would have been overjoyed if you’d agreed to travel with me. But I don’t deserve such happiness. And when you refused to allow me to accompany you, I knew you wouldn’t make it back alive.” He paused, letting the fact that she almost didn’t live through the experience remain unspoken. “Leaving the monastery without you held no appeal, so I stayed here. I need to atone and do some good for a change.”
His words sounded truthful, but believing him was difficult. “The monks are isolated, they don’t do—”
“Hanif said you’ve refused to see what’s really going on here. Is it because you planned to leave once you were old enough?”
“Hanif talks in riddles and won’t reveal anything until I take the oath.” Her tone was sharp with annoyance. She had grown up here and Rendor had only been here a couple dozen sun jumps.
“And you won’t take the oath until he tells you what is expected.”
“That’s not too much to ask.”
“You pledged your loyalty to the Invisible Sword without knowing anything.”
That stung even though it was true. “How did—” She sighed. Monks and acolytes were such gossips. “That was different. Banqui’s life was at stake.”
“So you trusted them.”
“And look what happened! It almost killed me.”
Rendor said in a quiet voice, “You’ve been given a second chance as well.” He reached for her, but paused then let his hand drop.
Disappointment swept through her. She craved his touch. But she didn’t trust herself to make the right choice. Instead she nodded and left before desire overruled logic.
Unable to stay still lest she be ambushed by her swirling thoughts and the image of Rendor’s bare chest, Shyla spent the next couple of sun jumps wandering through the monastery. What had she missed as a child? Hanif had already admitted that the monks were aware of the political machinations in Zirdai, including the suffering, but they remained neutral. Which explained her memories of certain monks disappearing for many sun jumps.
They didn’t directly help, but at least the monastery was an asylum for those who sought it. As she recalled more and more of her past, certain things stood out. They were protected by the King. Why? It couldn’t be due to sentiment or religious reasons. She almost groaned out loud. Of course. The monks spied for him. But how was that doing good? The King must know about Zirdai’s suffering, yet he had chosen not to interfere.
* * *
Each sun jump, Shyla thought of Jayden. Was he still alive? Gurice and Mojag had returned to Zirdai. Ximen had woken, but he had no memories of the fight and who had betrayed them.
Needing exercise, Shyla joined in the angle zero training session. Surprised to see Rendor sparring with a monk, she almost left. Instead, she watched the match from across the cavern. So used to being on the offensive, Rendor struggled with the concept of defense only. The teacher attacked and Rendor deflected the punches and kicks, but couldn’t stop countering with a blow or an ankle sweep or a flip.
When he sent the guy flying, Shyla chuckled. He had years of training and it was a waste of everyone’s time to try to change his techniques. His opponent had some skills, but Rendor needed a more qualified sparring partner. Someone faster. She wondered if she was up to the challenge. Those thoughts led to dangerous places. Finding another acolyte, Shyla worked out. She’d missed using the Ways of the Yarin.
