Page 12 of Gift of You
“The prime rib just needs about ten more minutes to rest and then I can carve it up. Should I pour you a glass of wine?”
“That would be nice, thank you.”
I stared at him a moment more, letting that gravelly bass voice of his wash over me, before turning to locate the wine glasses. I managed to find a couple of mismatched glasses in the back of one cupboard, then rummaged through the drawers looking for a bottle opener. I finally located a basic winged corkscrew—not as nice as my electric opener at home, but it would have to do—and made quick work of getting the bottle open and pouring a glass for each of us.
We took a sip as an awkward silence descended. I’d never been good with those—with allowing long moments to stretch between myself and other people that weren’t filled with conversation. I eyed Matthew contemplatively, debating what to say. There was so much about this man that I was curious about, but I didn’t know where to begin without putting my foot in my mouth once again.
I wondered about his childhood, though it was hard to picture the bearded man in front of me as a small human. Was he always so reserved, or was that something he’d developed after the death of his wife? What was his family like? Did he have siblings? And if he did, why wasn’t he spending the holiday with them? Asking those questions, however, seemed like a risky proposition, destined to end up with me apologizing all over again. So instead I asked, “Did you grow up around here?” That seemed less likely to break open some hidden trauma, yet might give some insight into his backstory.
“Allison and I grew up in the city. Moved here three years after we got married.”
Interesting. I wouldn’t have pegged him for a city boy.
“What brought you out here?”
“Allison was a high school English teacher for four years. She loved her students, but she decided the grind of teaching wasn’t for her. She talked me into moving here and opening a bookstore.”
“What were you doing for work at the time?”
“I was a corporate drone. Worked for a large insurance company.”
I goggled at him, glass of wine paused halfway to my lips. “Corporate? Like with a suit and tie? Did you carry a briefcase?”
“Dress was business casual. Khakis . . . polos . . . that sort of thing.”
Still, it was hard to imagine him in anything other than flannel and jeans. Though he was filling out his current sweater quite nicely. “Do you miss it?”
“Which one? Corporate life? Or living in the city?”
“Both.” I took another sip, then set down my glass and began carving the meat.
“I hated corporate life, and living away from the city took some getting used to.”
He’s a man of many words, I thought sarcastically.
“But you like it now?”
“Moving here made Ally happy. And that made me happy.”
What would that be like? To have someone so devoted to you that their happiness was interconnected with your own? And yet I’d long ago stopped waiting around for someone else to make me happy. My happiness was my own to make.
“Have you ever considered going back?”
He looked down at his glass as if the answer lay somewhere in the bottom of his wine. “No. My life is here.”
I finished cutting the prime rib, then pulled the green beans out of the oven where I’d put them to keep warm. I gave the mashed potatoes a stir, and then we plated our meals in the kitchen before taking them over to the small dining area near the window.
“The table looks nice. You didn’t have to go to any trouble.” On a whim I’d purchased a small red and green tablecloth and gold candles to dress up the space. I’d also bought a festive flower arrangement that fit perfectly with the other items I’d purchased. It made me smile.
“I’m glad you like it, but I purchased everything yesterday before I even had a notion of inviting you.”
“Oh.” A little crease formed between his brows, and I thought perhaps my blunt comment had been rude. I didn’t know why I couldn’t have just said a simplethank you. BeforeI could backtrack and amend my statement, he continued. “Do you always go to this much trouble when you’re just eating by yourself?”
“No, not always. But it’s a holiday, and I was feeling festive. Do I need to have dinner guests in order to decorate my table?”
“I don’t suppose you do. It’s just not something I’ve ever considered, I guess.”
“Once upon a time, I wished for a Prince Charming of my very own to come into my life and give it meaning. I dated throughout my twenties—had a few moderately serious relationships—but nothing ever panned out, and I realized I was living in this odd kind of limbo while I waited for the perfect guy. Then I’d be in my happily-ever-after era where my dreams would come true and my life would really begin. We’d buy a condo. Get a car. Maybe a dog or a cat. We could host dinner parties as a couple. Take exotic vacations.
