Page 77 of Oceansong
“I didn’t know. I’m sorry. But you know Wasilla had the center I wanted to work at. I needed money for school. Bàba offered to help with the costs, but I couldn’t put that pressure on him. Not with him taking care of Mama and all her medical bills.”
Mia visibly softened. “You don’t have to justify your choices to me.”
“Still, I regret not visiting more in the last six years.”
Angie focused on the mesmerizing Northern Lights, and put her head on Mia’s shoulder, the way she did when they were kids. After a pause, Mia exhaled a plume of frost, then put her head over Angie’s. “You ever want to get married? Start a family?”
Angie’s shoulders twitched at the mention. Marriage or children had never been at the forefront of her mind. She never daydreamed of her wedding day like Mia had once she and Nick began dating. Even when “well-meaning” aunties and uncles grilled her about why she was still single. That she needed to find a man before she became ashèngnu, or “leftover woman” which, to them, was any single woman older than her mid-twenties. And the best, when her aunties warned her not to be too successful or she would scare off potential suitors.
Notions Angie scoffed at in private.
She was content to be Angie ayí and marine biologist extraordinairewith her own office, aspiring to become head of the health sciences program at her graduate school while traveling during school breaks for research, and a house full of pets.
Kaden swam into her mind.
“I’m not sure.” She picked her words carefully. If they did go down that path, was it even a possibility? Biological children would be impossible regardless of what either of them would want. If she were to spend the rest of her life with him—an idea that made her giddy and shaky—how would they merge their two worlds? Or perhaps this was simply a fling for them both. Then again, Kaden’s words at their last meeting stated otherwise.
If I commit myself to you, I am yours for life.
It was all too much. He hadn’t said he wanted to give himself to her. She didn’t want to confront her own jumbled feelings either. It was a matter of weeks before they would be separated indefinitely.
“It’s nice in theory,” said Angie. “But I’m indifferent about kids. Besides, your kids and Lulu will be enough for me to handle. I don’t have that maternal instinct like you.”
“Well, I had Rosie when I was twenty-two. Everyone told me I was too young, but I knew what I wanted. If you know, you know.” Mia sobered at her words. “You’re leaving again soon. Your PhD program isn’t short, you know.”
“Depending on my schedule, I’ll come back more often. I’ll do my best.” No matter what, Angie promised herself she would visit, if only for several weeks, during school breaks, more often than she did while in Wasilla and Seattle. Kaden paddled his way into her mind again, and she couldn’t stop the starry eyes from coming on. “And I’ll consider marrying a man who can add to my life.”
Mia, perceptive as always, picked up on it right away. She gasped. “Is there someone special?”
“Maybe.” Angie turned and headed back for the party.
“I knew that bracelet came from someone. I didn’t see it when you first came back.”
Angie dropped her head. Rosie likely ran and asked her mother for a similar bracelet.
Mia followed at her heels. “Whoever he is, I hope you two are happy together. As long as it’s not one of those murderous sea creatures.”
She detected the joking tone with Mia’s last sentence, but still, an invisible knife poked at Angie’s chest. She rounded her shoulders in response. “We’re not any better than they are. They’re not all bloodthirsty monsters.”
Mia snorted her disbelief. “How would you know? Just because you’vegotten lucky and haven’t been hurt by one yet?”
Her words stung, and Angie fiddled with her empty glass and, with nervous hands, dropped it on the ground. It made a loudclackas the bottom of the glass made contact with the pebbled road. “Would you like to meet him?”
Mia’s eyes brightened.
Angie picked the glass back up. “I’m seeing him tomorrow evening. Come without Nick, alright? It’s okay to bring Rosie though. After work, seven o’clock.”
Mia’s face tightened, and one finger tapped at her seltzer water can as if making some sort of nonverbal point. “I’ll be there. I know you’re not telling me the whole story.”
Angie nodded, enjoying the peace and quiet. Owl hoots and frog songs and coyote howls filled the night. A breeze swept past, carrying with it the sea’s tangy scent, followed by the smell of fresh wood and sea air crispness.
Beside her, Mia’s lids were drooping, and they made their way back to the house. The anticipation of tomorrow evening made something in Angie’s chest jolt. She wanted Mia to see that not all mer were the enemy, but she hoped she hadn’t made a grave mistake.
Thirty-One
In true Mia fashion, shearrived with Rosie ten minutes before seven in the evening, as promised. Angie designated their meeting spot outside the storage shed, out of view of the seashore.
“Angie ayí! Angie ayí! Where’s your boyfriend?” Rosie hollered. “Is he gonna be my new uncle?”
