Page 18 of Is She Really Going Out with Him?
“I didn’t hack away. It was a small trim, perfectly within—”
“Touch it again, and I will escalate this to the council,” Noah says, his index finger waggling wildly now. Then he turns to stomp down my steps, shoulders hunched around his ears.
Back in the kitchen, Jess and Ethan eye me warily.
“It’s fine. It was only Noah,” I explain with a dismissive wave.
“Maybe you shouldn’t have cut it, Mum,” says Jess. “He really loves that hedge.”
“And I love sunlight and vitamin D. Whose side are you on?”
As I load the dishwasher with enough plate clanking to convey my irritation at Jess’s lack of loyalty, my phone pings with a message.
Neil Bradshaw
Hi Anna, Neil Bradshaw here. I believe Tilly and Ethan have been talking and they think we should hang out. Do you want to do a playdate one weekend? Take the kids to the park or something? I know what solo parenting can be like, so strength in numbers C etc. Neil.
A playdate? He’s asked me out on a playdate.
“Who’s that from?” Jess asks, noticing me pause to read the message again.
“Tilly Bradshaw’s dad, he’s suggesting a playdate.” I narrow my eyes at Ethan. “Whatexactlydid you say to Tilly?”
“I said you were looking for men to make friends,” Ethan says, looking thrilled to see his words cause some effect.
Jess reaches for my phone, and I let her read the message.
“He’s just making it sound like a playdate in case you say no. Reply, ‘Cool, let’s hang out, but not with the kids.’ ”
“I’m not going to say that. I might have to see this guy at the school gate.”
“He loves fishing!” Ethan cries. “Say you want to go fishing.”
“Don’t be ridiculous,” I say, laughing, but then I look up and see they both look serious.
“You asked for our help,” Jess says, folding her arms across her chest.
“Fine,” I say with a sigh as I compose a response to Neil.
Anna Appleby
Sounds good. Keen to hang out sans kids, if you are? Ethan says you like fishing. Never been, but I’m always up for trying something new.
Which must be the lamest message I’ve ever sent in my entire life.
My phone dings immediately.
Neil Bradshaw
It’s a date! Don’t have the kids on Sunday. Let me know where you live. I’ll pick you up and we’ll head to the river.
Looks like I’m going fishing.
Google searches:
Neil Bradshaw, Bath. Serial killer?
Hedge trimming, rights and rules, Avon and Somerset
