Page 54 of Freedom's Kiss
“Hey, watch it.” Michael wagged the stump of his amputated arm. “Your time will come, old man.”
Might already be here.
“Have you talked to Amber recently?” Michael asked.
Adam paused at the turn in the conversation. Amber? Was something wrong with his little sister that he didn’t know about? “Not really, why? Something up?”
“Yeah.” Michael’s mouth quirked sideways. “She’s finally chosen a major.”
Adam felt himself relax. Big news, but nothing to get his firstborn hackles rising. “Let me guess. English lit?”
“Nope. Theology.”
“She wants to be a pastor?”
“Or possibly a hospital chaplain.”
“Wow.”
“That’s what I said. She’s a little worried about receiving flak since she’s a female, but feels strongly God’s calling her to ministry.”
“Good for her.”
“She also told me that you’re suffering a bit from a Moses complex. Being a big baby and refusing the mantle God’s given you. Trying to pawn it off on an Aaron.”
Adam gripped the back of his neck, the muscles there spasming. “Not you too.”
Michael shrugged like it was no sweat off his back, but his eyes narrowed. “Don’t kill the messenger. But shoot straight. I get that you might have needed a break after…you know. But it’s time to rejoin the troops, man.”
“You don’t understand.”
Michael’s brows rose. “Don’t I?”
Having been a navy fighter pilot, Michael had shared with him some of the ethical dilemmas he’d grappled with. The guilt that would gnaw away at him after he returned from a mission and learned of the casualty count—those who’d been targeted along with the lives sacrificed as collateral damage.
“Do you have any idea how difficult it was to drop bombs and know that I was taking a life? But I did it because I had to believe in the bigger picture, the greater good. If evil is allowed to go unchecked, if the weak and defenseless have no one to fight for them, then where would this world be? Ruled by tyrants like Hitler or Stalin or ISIS.”
Adam leaned in and punched his finger to the table, imagining it was his brother’s chest. “But the thing is, I wasn’t fighting the bad guys—I was defending them. And those innocents that you so nobly defended, they…” He swallowed against a lump of self-loathing. “Well, I might as well have done to them what my clients had.”
“Adam—”
“No!” He fisted his palm and slammed it against his chest. “I refuse to allow you or anyone else to let me off the hook. Not when I shoulder that responsibility and blame. And I can’t do it again, Michael. I can’t look into another defendant, another victim’s eyes and know that I’m the reason they’ll never feel safe again. You…you slayed monsters. Me? I released them.”
“It’s not as cut and dry as that, and you know it.”
The pressure built until he became numb, too exhausted to fight any longer. “I don’t want to talk about it anymore.”
Michael exhaled, long and deep. “Fine. I really called to talk about Mom’s birthday anyway.”
Adam leaned back, switched the phone to his other hand. “Yeah? What about it?”
“You guys still planning on having family game night even though it’s her birthday?”
His lips tipped. “Mom would make sure we had game night even if the apocalypse knocked on her front door. A little birthday isn’t going to stop her.”
Michael grinned. “That’s what I thought. Jackie and I are flying in to surprise her, but don’t tell anyone. I’ll email you our itinerary, and if you wouldn’t mind picking us up at the airport, that’d be great.”
“You got it, Lieutenant.”
“Thanks, Moses.”
