Page 54 of Kissing is the Easy Part
“Honey, no. You need to stop this. I’m getting bad vibes. Don’t tell me you still have feelings for that guy.”
“I don’t know, but—” I hesitate, then blurt it out. “Hemight still be intome. He looks at me like . . . like he wants me but won’t let himself.”
She scoffs. “No,youwant him. Sean’s the tiger fromLife of Pi. Richard Parker, was it? You’re seeing your own emotions reflected back at you.”
“There were clues all over the place. He ate everything off my plate when I couldn’t finish. That has to mean something.”
“Sure,” she agrees. “It means he was hungry and has no boundaries. Get a golden retriever if that’s what you’re looking for.”
“But we’re history partners. Wehaveto spend time together.”
“Keep it professional. Have you forgotten how you were after the breakup?” Madison’s voice rises through the phone. “Look, I don’t do sweet and useless like Carmen, but I don’t want you crying over him again. Tears are boring.”
Those first few weeks—sleepless nights, tears on the pillow, the gut-punch rejection when he acted like we’d meant nothing. How is it so easy for him? How does he just move on while I’m stuck here, unraveling? My throat tightens. “You don’t understand what it’s like being around him. Half of me wants to drag him to the bathroom and kiss him senseless, and half of me wants to stab him with my chopsticks. I might even be subconsciously trying to seduce him. I want him to fall for me again.”
Madison lets out a sharp exhale. “Why in the world would you want that? He’s a shitty boyfriend who’ll bolt the next time you have a fight.”
She’s right, of course. But then, out of nowhere, a completely unhinged thought forms in my head. I run my fingers through my hair, pressing against my scalp like I can massage the logic back into me. “Maybe I can get him to fall for me . . . so I can dump him.”
Madison falls silent. Every second drips with judgment. “You already dumped him the first time. Why do it again?”
“I said it in the heat of the moment, but I didn’t mean it. He was the one who wanted to break up. I’ll never get over him unless he understands how it feels to be left behind.” The thought sparks, catching fire.
He needs to know what it’s like to lose me. He needs to feel it, deep in his bones, the way I did. Sean thinks he can stand up and leave like I was some passing phase? No. He can’t escape me. I’m back—vengeful and even more powerful in the sequel.
“I already know how it’s all going to play out. Your plan backfires, and I spend the rest of the year listening to you wail about it.”
“Please, I need this. To gain my power back. It’s the only way to stop feeling like I lost.”
“Or, hear me out, you could move on like a normal person. Go to therapy—”
“Madison.”
She mutters something unintelligible. “You’re insane. Getting revenge is something onlyI’ddo.”
“That’s why I need your wisdom on the art of revenge! Teach me your ways,senpai.”
Madison doesn’t speak. I can almost hear the gears churning in her head, coughing up evil schemes. After an eternity, she sighs. “This is a terrible idea.”
A pause.
Then, grudgingly, “But as your best friend, I’ll support every single one of your terrible ideas.”
* * *
Madison’s first action plan is a group date. Our cover is the newly opened ice-cream parlor a block from school. We must check it out and see how it stacks up against our old favorite, Amber’s. We tell the guys Carmen is writing a review for the school newsletter and needs extra opinions. (Not that we share our real motives with Carmen, for obvious reasons.)
The moment we step inside, we’re greeted with the warm scent of freshly made cones. The place is all soft peach-colored sofas and floral cushions on one side, stiff-backed chairs on the other. It’s cute, but trying a little too hard.
Sean falls in step beside me, waiting for me to pick a seat. I sink into a sofa.
“I have an idea for the school newsletter.” Jake plops down next to me before Carmen can even sit. “You should interview me, Carmesan.” He snags the menu from under my hands. Sean grabs another from the counter and takes the seat across from me, sliding it across the table.
“They canceled the Student Spotlight column ages ago,” Madison replies in her signature authoritative tone, even thoughCarmenis the editor-in-chief. “Otherwise I would’ve had my feature already.”
“No, not an article onmeper se. People know I’ve been voted Most Gorgeous three years straight and I’m the best small forward this town has ever seen.” Jake rakes a hand through his hair, as if mesmerized by his own achievements.
“Are we sure the votes weren’t rigged?” I cut in. “I didn’t vote for you once.”
