Page 88 of Kissing is the Easy Part
“You tried to kiss me, and he saw it. Now you’re on the blacklist.”
“But how’s that even possible? I don’t like you like that!” He seems offended, like I insulted his exemplary taste.
“I’m telling you, it happened. There’s a good reason Sean doesn’t want to hang out with you, and, like, can you blame him?”
“I’m sorry,” he says, even though I never blamed him. “You’re my friend, and I know how much you like him. I really didn’t expect my actions to cause full-scale diplomatic tensions. I’ll apologize to Sean too. Maybe send him a fruit basket. Seriously, I feel bad.”
“No, he didn’t want me to tell you. He’s embarrassed about the whole thing.” Sean and his ego refuse to let Raymond have the satisfaction of knowing he came between us.
“But I don’t want him to hate me.” It’s amazing how Ray has no trouble hating everyone, but the idea ofbeinghated is unbearable. He has this unexplainable urge to stay on everyone’s good side.
“Forget it.”
“Well, I can’t apologize to him, I can’t invite him to hang out, so what does that leave us? Are we just . . . done? Is this it?”
Oh god. I was never in a relationship with Raymond, but now we’re breaking up.
“We can still say hi at school. And I’ll like every one of your Instagram posts.” I try to lighten the mood. “That’s what friends are for, anyway. To make you feel popular on social media.”
He grunts. “Well, if you’ll excuse me, I’m gonna hang up now and check if you’ve actually liked any of my posts.”
I let out a long breath, exhausted. The doorbell rings, and I sprint to answer it, nearly tripping over a pile of shoes on the way.
Sean stands before me in a (very huggable) eggshell-white hoodie, his backpack slung over one shoulder. In the back of my mind, I picture opening the doors of a cathedral, where the organs play and the angels sing. A halo surrounds Sean andfine, I worship him.
So what?
“Button.” He tugs on my fishtail braid. I step aside to let him in, but he bends down to kiss me first. His lips are soft but firm, and waiting for him was totally worth it. He tastes like chocolate.
“Did you put cookies in my backpack?” he asks.
“Yeah. In case you got hungry during the game.”
He pinches my cheek, already heading toward my room. “You’re the best. I ate most of them before the game even started.”
“Did you win?”
“Yes.” He flops onto my bed. “How was your evening?”
“Um, Raymond called. Do you want to drink beer with him?”
“What?”
“It might be a good idea if we all hang out together. Maybe you’ll learn to like him!”
“No thanks. What if he tries to kiss me?”
I chuckle. “It’d be great if you guys got to know each other better.”
He cringes. “I don’t know.”
“I told him I can’t hang out with him the way we did before. He wasn’t happy about it, and I feel like an awful friend.”
“Josie never gives me attitude for that. She gets that some things have to change.”
But do they? This is such an absurd system. I don’t care at all that Sean has Josie, but he gives that up simply for the sake of being fair. “You know how crazy I am about you. You shouldn’t be threatened by other guys at all.”
“I’m not threatened. It’s like eating a meal with flies buzzing around. I’m not threatened by the flies, but they still annoy the hell out of me.” He sighs, rubbing his temple. “Look, I’m not here to control who you spend time with. I trust you, and I know you’d never intentionally cross a line. And again, I’m sorry for how I jumped to conclusions last year. But I won’t pretend I’m comfortable with you drinking alone with another guy in your room. Seeing him come on to you before—that image is seared into my mind. You know where I stand, but ultimately, it’s your decision. If this is something you’re not willing to adjust, maybe we need to ask ourselves whether we see relationships the same way.”
