Page 58 of Beautifully Ruined
Cade:Sorry…number three or number nine?
Dinner?Sexual position? The form of punishment?
I’m about to ask him when the heat of arousal curling up inside me stops me.
There’s a delicious thrill in this, and I’m here for it. I don’t need to know what he’s talking about. I’m assuming dinner, but it could be something else.
Me:Number seven.
Cade:You asked for it.
I don’t even knowwhy this makes me happy, but it does. I like the element of surprise, the fact I can find the long game pull as mesmerizing and full-on sex play anticipation.
Maybe the fact that I can play on the edge of all the meanings that come with the word surprise and Cade is part of it, part of us.
With a slow release of breath, I go to a few specialized sites on my computer in the living room to look for the right position.
Then I go to his room, strip off my dress, and then kneel on the floor, ass on my feet, thighs apart, head and eyes down. I’m not sure what his preferred placement is for hands, whether it’s behind the back or in front, but I decide to put them, palms up, on my thighs.
And I wait.
It’s a funny thing, sitting like this, in supplication, because it makes me both at peace and yearn to see him. It turns me on like he’s in the room, touching, stroking, urging me slowly toward orgasm.
Is this how it feels to have your dark desires fulfilled?
I don’t know.
Time seems to move differently, like its outside itself.
My blood pounds in my ears as it swooshes through my veins. Its beat as it fills my clit.
I’m wet, hot all over, and humming somewhere from within.
From somewhere, a door thuds. Footsteps.
I’m not alone.
Smokey woods and basil. Leather and incense. Dark and dirty sex in an old church.
Cade.
The Ghost.
Mine.
All mine.
And a shiver that’s close to orgasmic rakes down my spine.
“Perfect little slut of a slave, is that it?” He stands in the doorway. “Or just a filthy girl thinking she can somehow take the upper hand?”
Slut. It’s not a word I like, along with cunt. But from him, to me, in sex play it’s hot.
It’s the promise of filth and more dirty talk and actions.
I risk a glance up, and his dark eyes are burning, on me. It’s like he’s touching my clit.
“Well?” Cade asks.
