Page 31 of Bleed the Shadows
Marv beamed. “Right?” He looked at Poe. “Take those from her so she’ll have room for the maple bar when you get back to the loft.”
Poe tried to pull the bag from my hands, then tugged when I didn’t let it go.
“I’ll just hold this until we get home. You really don’t want to miss Marv’s maple bar.”
We said goodbye and headed back through Southside. Poe nodded and lifted a hand in greeting to the people we passed, like he was the mayor or some kind of celebrity. They seemed happy to see him, so different from the way people in town treated Bram.
Like he didn’t exist.
“Why doesn’t anyone talk to Bram?” I asked him.
Poe stopped at the crosswalk and we waited for the light to change. “In case you haven’t noticed, Bram’s not really a talker.”
I couldn’t argue with that. “They don’t even look at him. It’s like he’s invisible.”
“They’re scared,” Poe said.
“But why? I mean, I know why.” Let’s be honest, Bram was scary as fuck. “But why can’t theylookat him?”
Poe was silent as we crossed the street and started toward the loft. “People look away from things that scare them.”
I thought about all the people who’d disappeared from our lives after June’s murder. They muttered words of condolence if we saw them in the grocery store, but invitations to cookouts and holiday parties stopped coming.
My dad said it was because people didn’t know what to say, but that had sounded like a cop-out to me.
Saysomething. Say anything.
Or just… I don’t know, be there. Act like you can actually see us.
Like we still exist.
But the more I thought about it the more I realized it wasn’t just because they didn’t know what to say: they were afraid. Afraid of saying the wrong thing, of feeling stupid or uncertain.
But not just that. They were afraid of what had happened to us. Afraid if they looked at it too long they’d realize it could happen to anyone.
That it could happen to them too.
What had happened to Bram to make people look away?
My heart felt heavy when we reached the loft and I trudged up the stairs ahead of Poe, telling myself maybe Bram really was just a monster. Maybe everyone saw it, and maybe that’s why they couldn’t look at him.
I didn’t really believe it though.Isaw him. I just didn’t know what I was looking at yet.
Remy was in the kitchen when we got to the second floor.
“Thought you’d bailed again, killer.”
I rolled my eyes. “Only in my dreams.”
It wasn’t true, but saying it was easier than acknowledging how I really felt about being back at the loft.
Like I was home.
Poe set the pink bakery box on the island. “Want a donut?”
Remy scowled. “You might as well ask if I want a referral to a cardiologist.”
Poe took down two plates. “Do you?”
