Page 52 of Alien Desire
We are only a couple of months apart in age and were sent to live with the Alphas at the same time. As a consequence, we have always been close. A born showman, Zyam likes to tease me and he is one of the few Grytons who I allow to do this.
“I’m sure I have sent an SOS far quicker than you would have, youngster.” He is three Astia months younger than me and I like to remind him of this frequently.
‘How have you survived all this time, brother?’
‘I will tell you the long story when I am home.’ There may be others intercepting and reading our messages and Zyam understands I have something to tell but I am being cautious. He doesn’t push me for information.
Strax is a quieter soul than Zyam. An observant thinker who only speaks when he has something to say. It is he who heads straight for my mother and relays the news that I am alive and well.
‘How has she been?’ I ask him.
‘As you would expect,’ he writes back, ‘distraught. She has hardly left her chambers. She was relieved beyond words to hear you are safe.’
‘You will pass my greetings to her and tell her that I will visit as soon as I am home?’
‘Of course.’
‘And I would like you and Zyam to come with the rescue mission.’ I tell them. I want my allies to be the first to meet my Omega.
But this request is denied by my father who says he can’t spare them from Astia while the eastern uprising is ongoing. I ask about this rebellion and what has come to pass in the long months I have been away. Their answers are brief and I know this means they have news to tell me too. News that must be relayed in person.
This adds to my unease. What has been happening in Astia since I left? Rebellions are very rare. My father rules with an iron fist. I am not sure if this makes my plight easier or more dangerous.
Once the navigator has calculated the route and the physics involved in the journey, I’m informed that the rescue party will arrive in one day.
One day to win the Omega back around. Because as things stand I’m not going to be able to convince anyone she is my Omega, baby in her belly or not. Unclaimed she’ll be added to my father’s harem at best, and at worst she’ll be sent to the research facility for experimentation.
I need to make her understand all this, but I suspect it will do nothing to win her over to the idea that she is coming with me. She seems intent on believing she is going back to her planet. Sheila informs me that she has even used my upgraded communications system to send a message to her people.
This animosity between us, this distance as cold as the frozen landscape beyond the station, has grown. And every day that passes it seems a little more indestructible. I don’t know how to undo this. I don’t understand how to correct things between us. I am shocked by how quickly the heart of a human can go from raging hot to freezing cold.
I take to sitting on the other side of the locked door and listening to her movements inside the sleeping bay, to her mumbled comments to Fluffy and to her commands to Sheila.
I can’t leave her. I can’t leave my child. But can I live like this? Shut out, ignored by the woman who has entranced me.
“They are arriving tomorrow,” I say, not knowing if she is listening. “You need to be ready to go.”
“I’m not going with you,” she says. The first words in days. I sit up a little straighter.
“We cannot go on like this, Omega. You cannot ignore me and speak to me like this when we arrive on Astia.”
“Tor, I’m not coming with you. I’m going home.”
“I don’t want to force you but I will.” I know my words are only making things worse but I can’t help it. I don’t know what else to say.
“Leave me alone,” she cries.
And my heart suddenly aches for her. She is in an impossible situation. One I planted her firmly in. She can’t go home. The flight by human spacecraft is long and arduous and giving birth in space could be fatal. She knows this. So what? She stays here, alone with dwindling supplies, and gives birth with no medical assistance?
Or she comes with me to a universe she does not know, with a species she knows little about. And the things she does know, the bits I’ve told her, must be so alien.
“Astia is a beautiful planet,” I tell her. “In my opinion the most beautiful in the whole of the known universes. The people are blunt but they are also kind and loyal. You will want for nothing. You will live in luxury. Our child will have everything it will ever need or want. And I will spend the rest of my days ensuring you are safe.”
“Like your dad has your mum,” she says.
I don’t know how to reply to that. It is different. My father doesn’t care for my mother the way I care for Emma. And deep down I know that these feelings are the reason I can’t let her go. But how do I explain all this?
Clambering to my feet, I head off to the makeshift bed I’ve made near the computer to try to get some sleep. Tomorrow will come and with it my rescue ship and for now I can only hope that Emma will see sense.
