Page 94 of Harper's Holiday Romance
I was hurtling towards Julia like a comet crashing into the earth’s atmosphere, and I had no idea how I got there.
16
I sat by the pool’s edge watching Julia intently. She lay back in a hammock floating above the shallow pool’s surface. She donned her staple trucker cap. The sun beat down on her bronzed body. She brushed her fingers over the surface of the water below, and trickled the beads of water along the length of her torso. I struggled to picture a holiday without her. My experience had been like no other because ofher. But like a giant alarm frustratingly sounding in the background I couldn’t get away from the inevitable.
Julia was leaving.
The reality hit me like a monstrous wave crashing its way to shore and sending me hurtling back into the sandy waterside. In sixteen hours, she would be back on a plane to the states. I tried to ignore it. We spent all day lounging by the pool, sipping cocktails, and laughing like the giant clock above our heads didn’t exist.
Billie crept up beside me. “How are you feeling?”
The question was too open-ended. I shrugged.
“Look, I know long-distance relationships face a whole range of struggles, but it doesn’t mean it can’t work. You get enough holiday days to visit the states a couple of times a year, and Julia could do the same in return. It isn’t impossible.” Billie sat beside me, our legs feeling the benefit of the cool water.
“I don’t even know if she would want that. I don’t know if I would want that. I tried a long-distancerelationship once, remember? It lasted two months, and it was three hours away by car, not eight hours by plane.”
“That was also with a girl you’d met once at Manchester Pride. She practically harassed you on social media to go on a date and wanted to move in with you after a week. I think we can comfortably say that was never going to work, and the three-hour distance ended up being an easy way out for you.”
“Okay, so it’s a bad example.”
Billie nudged me. “She’s different.”
“I know.”
My ex still played on my mind. The fear of one day telling her I’d fallen in love with someone else was enough to make me run a thousand miles in the opposite direction. I didn’t want to hurt her, but I knew eventually I had to put myself first. Maybe it was time to accept that I wasn’t responsible for someone else’s happiness or the fallout from me obtaining my own.
“I’m scared to say goodbye. I’m equally scared to put pressure on what should have been a holiday romance.” I looked over at Julia. She smiled back with the biggest grin. Perfection. “I guess I’m scared I might never see that smile again, and I’ll end up spending the rest of my life obsessing over what could’ve been.”
“There’s your answer,” Billie said. She jumped up and placed her hands on my shoulders. “Don’t live with regrets, Harps. They’ll eat away at you.”
Julia clambered gracefully out of the hammock, which was impressive. The day before I had tried to exit the hammock, and during the struggle I’d resembled a giant turtle on its back. She had on a black bikini with small wooden beads decorating the ties on the sides. She held out her hand to help me up. “Follow me.”
The wooden boardwalk leading up to the jacuzzi was surrounded by palm trees and clear blue shallow water. The small speakers in the nearby bushes played a Mexican instrumental; it was like Mexico’s version of Ibiza chill. The birds were overpowering in the trees above, but the combination of the music, the jacuzzi jets, and the birds, created a serenity you only find in spas. There were five man-made Jacuzzis in total, similar to the cenotes, the natural limestone had been used to create the sunken water-filled tubs.
Julia kicked off her flip-flops at the edge and carefully stepped down into the warm water. I followed.
“How have I been here twelve days and not been in the Jacuzzis?”
“It’s my fault; I’ve taken up a lot of your time.” Julia smirked.
“You have. I blame you.”
“You haven’t been able to see the whole resort. I’ve ruined your experience; how terrible of me.” Julia sat back against the stone edge. Her arms were outstretched.
“You have been my experience,” I said softly.
“Come here,” Julia purred.
I scooted around the side until I was comfortably snuggled in between Julia’s legs. The stone seating was deep enough to accommodate us both.
“This is nice. Isn’t it?” I let my head fall back onto her shoulder.
“It’s amazing,” Julia answered. The warmth of her breath glided past my ear. Her lips left a small kiss on my earlobe. I remained silent, taking it all in: the sound of birds, the rush of water, the flurry of wind, Julia’sraspy voice, and the feeling of her slender toned arms wrapped around my shoulders.
It felt surreal.
I still felt like I might wake up at any moment and be propelled into the present day without Julia. It felt like a cruel dream soon to be ripped from my grasp with no forewarning, and I would be left to adjust, to accept, and to reminisce.
