Page 118 of The Truth About You and Me
‘You’re welcome,’ I say. ‘Anytime.’ The woman nods and shifts her way through the aisle.
Anytime.
I sink into the recently vacated space. I can’t control the grin that is stretching across my face. I must look unhinged but I don’t care.
I’m coming, Jack.
54
MAGGIE
I run from the station, my breath hot and dry, until I’m standing outside the shop. New paintwork, book displays and gifts arranged behind the clean window. I take a moment to calm my breathing and tame my hair. And mustering every ounce of my newly discovered control, I reach for the door and open it.
He doesn’t notice me come in. All eyes are on him as he reads, that voice I love so much, steady, deep, soft. I stand to the side, obscured mostly by a bookcase.
‘Turn the page! Turn the page! Turn the page!’
‘There’s still nothing there!’ A red-headed boy scowls and folds his arms.
‘Ah, but that’s because you haven’t activated the magic yet.’ Jack reaches to the table and picks up a torch, flicking it on and passing it to the boy.
Jack’s eyes tear away from the children as I step out from behind the bookshelves.
The room stills.
His eyes meet mine, dark, intense.
‘That’s my name!’ Jack’s gaze is pulled away from me, back on the children letting out squeals, heads turning, eyes almost popping out of their sockets as names emerge on the back page of the book under the torch’s beam.
‘And mine!’
He passes the book to a little girl with brown pigtails and asks her to pass it around with the torch, then gets up.
We walk towards each other. The room quietens. Like the tension, and love, and hope is expanding into the room. We stop short of touching. In my periphery, Jack’s family, customers, Nell… all eyes are on us. It’s only been a few months, but I’d forgotten how tall, howJack, Jack is.
‘You came.’
‘I did.’ I smile, my whole body shaking. ‘You did brilliantly just then. Amazing.’
‘I can’t take all of the credit. I had help.’
I look to the right. Nell watching on with a soppy smile.
‘I…’
How to begin to tell him everything that I want to say? How to tell him, in Riz’s words, how much ofa magnificent foolI’ve been. All that comes is:
‘I’ve missed you.’
I step closer.
Jack looks pleased that I came, but I don’t know how he feels about me, don’t know if he even wants me in his life any more. ‘I know that I hurt you, and that I’m not the easiest person to be with…’ His expression is hard to read: understanding maybe? Is he going to agree that walking away from us was the right thing? I power on, ‘And I reallyreallydon’t expect you to forgive me for walking away without fighting for you, for us, and I totally get it if you don’t want to—’ The words fall from my mouth in a rush, bursting to get free.
‘What are you saying, Maggie?’ He tilts his head, eyes scanning my face.
‘The thing—’ I let out a breath, my throat tight. ‘The thing is. I couldn’t remember. What it is to be loved. To be part of a whole instead of watching from the outside. And, and… I’ve come here with no expectations because I know loving me will be hard and I know I’m not perfect and?—’
‘Love isn’t supposed to be perfect, Maggie.’ His eyes darken, that seriousness, that sincerity, which I love about him rising to the surface. ‘Love is made up of all the broken pieces that make usus.’
