Page 100 of The Vacation Mix-Up
“How would you know?”
“Because I do. You’re just grieving and afraid to let go.”
Drawing in a deep breath, my chest quakes as I exhale. “I miss her, and this urn is all I have left.”
“So sprinkle her ashes and keep the urn, then you both get what you want.” He rubs his beard. “Are you even allowed to scatter ashes from a cruise ship?”
“Yeah, you are. But… I’m running out of time… and ocean. AndI can’t actually scatter her ashes. I have to toss the entire urn.”
He pulls a “that’s weird” face.
I nod sarcastically. “Uh-huh. I have to pitch her like a baseball. Actually,” I add, laughing softly, “she wanted me to shoot her like a free throw.”
Riley chuckles. “Your Mom sounds fun.”
“She was. A little loco here and there, but lots of fun. She did the research of disposing of her remains and presented it to me like a sales pitch.”
He chuckles again. “Really?”
“Yep.” I sniffle. “Pictures, detailed instructions, diagrams, and all.”
“Jesus!”
“When I’m ready, I have to go to Guest Services, book a date and time for her ‘free throw,’ and weather permitting, a member of the crew will assist me.” Staring out at the icy ocean again, my blood runs just as cold. “I’m not ready. I’m not ready to say goodbye for the final time.”
“But that’s the thing, Riles,” he says, his finger gently grazing my chin as he turns my head toward his. “You’ll never be ready to say goodbye. No one ever is.”
I swallow hard. “So how do I do it?”
“You just…” He holds my stare, strength from his supportive eyes pouring into mine. “You just do.”
chapter sixteen
RILEY
Riles clutching her mother’s urn shattered my heart. I’ve been where she is, holding onto my father’s coffin for dear life, hellbent on not letting go before he was lowered into the ground. I know her pain, her guilt, her regret.
I know her fear and despair.
What I don’t know is her loneliness, because she was right… I did have Mom and Roni when Dad passed. I still do. And although I’ve never felt as lonely as I do now, her solitude and mine are different.
Stepping forward, next in line, I wait my turn at the Guest Services desk. Riles shouldn’t be alone in grief, and it kills me knowing she has no one to turn to or to help her through the toughest moments of her life. We’ve only just met, but I can’t stand aside while she crumbles and breaks. That’s not who I am, as a fellow human being, nor as a man who just had his world rocked by her lips.
That kiss. Jesus! It sparked a fire within me that I thought had long burned out, nothing left but ash and angry embers. A fire Krystal used to ignite but instead extinguished with her ice-queen heart. I suspected kissing Riles would spark something, becauseI’m wildly attracted to her, but never did I imagine it would light the fuse it did. In fact, I think it’s still crackling.
When she so effortlessly dismissed the kiss and the effect it had, I’d been royally pissed. Hurt even. And in my usual false I-could-not-care-less attitude, I pulled out my asshole card and sent her running to get away from me. I don’t want to do that anymore. All it ever achieves is me in a bar, licking my wounds and drowning my guilt and sorrow. It pushes me ten steps back, when I’m supposed to be moving forward.
When I followed her back to the room to demand that she too admit she felt something,anything, I never expected to walk in on the situation I did. But if I hadn’t, I would never have overheard her telling her mom she thought our kiss was incredible.
And it was.
It damn well stopped time.
And I plan to stop it again.
Just not now. Not… yet.
“Next please!” the crewmember behind the desk calls, the same guy from embarkation day, his demeanor pleasant until his eyes land on mine.
