Page 124 of Beyond Protection
"For how long?"
He didn't answer.
The radio crackled. Michael: "Perimeter check complete. Next check in sixty."
"Copy," Eamon said.
"I almost bought you something today," I said. "At the market."
He looked at me. "What?"
"Didn't actually buy it. Picked it up. Thought about it. Put it back." I kept my eyes on the tree. "Leather journal. Small, fits in a pocket. I thought when this was over, I'd go back and get it."
"You don't—"
I looked at him and interrupted. "I keep thinking about Portland. Your apartment with the books and vinyl. About visiting. Seeing you in your space instead of mine."
He didn't respond. Only kept his eyes fixed on me.
"I keep thinking about after," I continued. "When Vanessa's in custody and you're not my bodyguard, whether you'll just leave. Or if maybe there's something else we haven't named yet."
The rain kept falling.
Eamon reached for my hand and threaded his fingers through mine.
"There's something else," he said quietly. "You know there is."
"Yeah. I do."
"And when this is over, we're going to figure out what it is."
"Promise?"
"Promise."
We sat like that for a long time. Breathing through the waiting.
At some point, the Christmas tree timer clicked off. Darkness filled the living room except for the glow from the streetlights.
"You should try to sleep," Eamon said. "Tomorrow's going to be—"
"I know what tomorrow's going to be."
"So sleep."
"Can't. Every time I close my eyes, I smell her perfume. I'm back in that room, seeing the envelope." I squeezed his hand. "I can't sleep knowing she's out there. Knowing there are a thousand ways tomorrow can go wrong."
"We'll stop her."
"You keep saying that."
"Because I believe it."
He was quiet. Then: "Come on."
"Where?"
"Your room. To reclaim it. So it's not just the place she violated. So it's where you pushed back."
