Page 66 of Interference
I shake my head. “Total accident, but I would like to think it is more like fate.”
“I would say. He has been panting after this chick for years,” Wyatt mutters.
“I knew when he went to her for tea for Grace in her freshman year when she was sick. He could have gotten tea from the store, but he went to a girl,” Clay adds.
“We had only slept together like twice at that point.” I roll my eyes.
“How long after that did you stop sleeping with other women?” Beckett asks.
“Fuck you, man. I didn’t know you monitored my bedmates. Should I be concerned you are a voyeur? I think your wife might want to know about that,” I toss at him.
“Come on, bro. Everyone knew you were obsessed with her. So does she hate you for putting a bun in her oven?” Beckett asks.
“Dude, she has been coming over and having dinner with us. They are full-on dating at this point.” Kellan laughs.
“Whoa, so the baby thing worked for you, huh? Maybe that’s why those greedy women always try it,” Beckett muses.
“Beck, you are getting off topic,” Clay reminds him. “Seriously, are you happy? It’s okay to be scared. Becoming a father is a huge step. I know you didn’t have the best childhood. Are you taking it okay?” Clay asks.
I think about my answer while the guys stay silent.
“I had a shitty childhood. That’s true. My father never cared much about me. I was a problem he could throw money at. I started hockey because of a therapist telling my nanny it would be a good way to channel my aggression, and I turned it into this. Am I scared? Yes. Being a father is scary for anyone. How will you know you are doing the right thing? Can I fuck up my kid? Will his or her mom want to be with me forever? All of this weighs on me, but then I think of that squishy little face and I know it will be okay because there is one thing that kid will never lack. Love.”
“No, they won’t. They will have a father and four uncles who love them without question,” Wyatt adds, bumping into me.
“Don’t forget, Emery. I can tell she already loves the little one, too,” Kellan adds.
“You have Grace, Peyton, and Cora too. The kid will have a whole family at their back,” Clay reminds me.
“I know. It’s why I didn’t even hesitate when she told me. I’m ready for this,” I tell him.
Beckett laughs. “Good. What about the draft? You still going for it?”
I shake my head. I hadn’t told them yet.
“Hockey was never my dream. It was something to do. Then it was a way to stay connected to you guys. The likelihood of us ending up in the same place is small. I don’t want that. I want to be with my kid. I don’t want to miss their first steps or whatever side stuff they get into. I want to be there for it all.”
“You should be a coach,” Beckett says. “You did great coaching us last year. I bet you could coach any sports your kid does. Maybe even take on some high school stuff? You would be so good at getting guys ready for playing in college.”
I smile. “You think so?”
He nods. “You kept the team going even if you weren’t on the ice. You’d excel at it.”
“I’ve considered it, but hearing you say that makes me think I should do some more research,” I admit.
“Do it and report back. No more keeping secrets,” he warns.
“It’s not because I didn’t want you to know,” I tell him. “I wasn’t sure if Emery really wanted the whole world knowing.”
“We aren’t the whole world, Brett,” Clay says.
“We are family,” Beckett adds.
I nod. “It won’t happen again. Want to see the ultrasound?”
At their resounding “yes,” I pull out the photograph from my wallet and hold it up to the camera. We spend an hour laughing and joking about me being a dad, then moving on to what everyone else is up to.
In this moment, I know my shitty childhood never mattered. It will never touch my child because I have a family right here.
