Page 20 of Reindeer and Restraints
I would have been happy about a lot of nicknames but that didn't excite me. In fact, the more I thought about it, the worse it seemed.
I should have just told her. If she put two and two together, that Walker who works at the reindeer ranch must be her half-brother's friend Walker who owns the reindeer ranch, then so be it.
But I desperately wanted more time with her. No interference from anyone else like a protective older brother.
Except as I spent even more time trying to figure out how to tell Jeremy, it occurred to me that Jolene might have already figured out who I was. That might have been her motivation behind avoiding my name. Maybe she wants the same thing, more time before we have to admit our relationship would cross a line for her brother.
And all of the dismissed calls and clipped texts truly are just her getting used to taking on a kid.
Enough's enough. Before I confess to Jeremy that I banged his sister, I have to make my feelings crystal clear to her. If she rejects me, we bury the secret forever. But if she'll accept my commitment to her, I'll handle the fallout with her brother.
With a plan in place, and not wanting to let Christmas pass without confessing, I grab my phone.
I type a text, then delete it. I need her voice, and I need to see her as soon as possible.
I dial her number, grumbling that it's going to come up as a call fromHim. It sounds more like a codeword to know not to answer than a nickname.
To my surprise, she picks up. I shouldn't have gotten in my head about her feelings for me. "You busy?"
"Actually, I'm free." She sounds super relaxed. "Jeremy took Jane to her family's Christmas Eve party."
"That was nice of him." I should probably feel guilty for taking advantage of his kindness, but I don't.
"I offered to go, but he insisted I take a break."
"Are you home alone?" Aside from Jane being gone, I'm not sure if her stepbrother knows she has friends with benefits.
"I am. Do you want me to invite you over?"
"It'll be easier to give you an orgasm if I can put my hands on you instead of this phone."
"Hmmm… I've heard phone sex can be pretty hot. Want to know what I'm wearing?"
"I want your address."
"You are no fun." She laughs then rattles it off.
Slipping the ring box into my jacket pocket, I consider whether I'll give it to her before or after sex. Definitely after. The ring is just a symbol to show my commitment to her, not an official engagement ring because I'm trying like hell to respect her request for time.
Then I grab the bigger gift, her very own set of leather restraints, and head out.
Chapter 10
Jolene
A visit withHimis a tease of how I imagined my life would be after the auction… unlimited orgasms from men… well, froma manwho adores me and didn’t give up on me no matter how many calls I ignored or texts I sent short, dismissive responses to.
I crank up Christmas pop songs through the house speakers so it doesn't seem like I'm sitting home alone sulking. The sulking stopped onceHecalled.
In my bedroom, I slip into the sexy red lingerie I'd splurged on for after the auction, the sheer babydoll with lace edges. The term 'babydoll' hits me as being awkward for the first time ever.Becoming a mom rewires your brain, turning innocent words into landmines.
I sit at my vanity, open my makeup box and get to work. A swipe of red lipstick, smoky eye shadow, and a bit of body glitter liven me up.
Just because diapers and bedtime stories fill my days doesn't mean I forfeit the need to feel desired.
Jeremy has Jane for the next few hours and Hudson had his mother's family's Christmas party. If not for Hudson's wall calendar, I don't think I could keep all of the Christmas festivities straight. Too manyhalfandstepfamily celebrations.
The doorbell chimes and I blow my fabulous self a kiss in the mirror before padding to the front door. My heart races and my body yearns for his touch. I'm relieved that he reached out. I'd been afraid that he would give up on me. That's why I didn't want to know his name, less to etch on my heart if he broke it.
