Page 6 of Reindeer and Restraints
Penny shakes her head. “I’m sorry, I can’t. But Jolene can still do the auction.”
My shoulders slump. “I have a kid now. Don’t get me wrong. I love her.”
Penny’s tone is calm. “You're still a virgin.”
“Who would want to bid on a mom?” Reality drops on me in clumps. “Oh my god. I’d have to hire a babysitter.”
Bellamie’s phone rings but she finishes the call quickly and brings me a tissue. “Time to make a game plan for Mama Jo.”
I think I hate the nickname.
Bellamie’s quick to offer, “I can whip up some casseroles for your freezer and coordinate meals so that you don't have to do any cooking while you transition into motherhood. And I'll definitely help with babysitting, because I'm guessing you're going to have to get some affairs in order.”
Starla offers to help too. Penny says,” I'll cook meals for you and I can run errands, but don't ask me to babysit.”
“I have the best friends.” Despite my words, for the first time ever, I struggle to feel joy.
Bellamie says, “You don’t have to go into motherhood alone. We’re here for you. And if I can remain a virgin by turning down sex with the hottest, most perfect guy I've ever met, we can certainly find you a babysitter for Friday night.”
"Hudson will lose it if I spring a two-year-old on him. He's so tidy. I think he already realized he made a mistake by inviting me to live with him."
"He adores you," Starla assures me.
"Hedid, but he's been dropping hints about settling down, futures, and commitments. I haven't been able to figure out if he's trying to tell me he has a girlfriend, or that I need to get a life." I squeeze my eyes shut. "Either way, I can't be a third wheel with a kid, cluttering his world."
"Take a breath," Bellamie says calmly.
"I quit my job." The words tumble out.
Starla scoots closer, her knee bumping mine. "They'll take you back at the coffee shop. They loved you."
I shake my head. "It's barely enough to support me, much less a toddler? Oh my god, what about college? I need to start saving up for that. I see the error of my—"
"Calm down," Starla gives me a hug. "No need to worry about college yet. Do you think your cousin had life insurance?"
"Not a chance. She jumped from one dead-end job to another."
Bellamie asks, "What about the baby's father?"
"She wasn't sure who it was, but said she'd told the most likely candidate. He ghosted her. Not the type of person you want in a kid's life. Jane needs stability."
Bellamie squeezes my shoulder. "Look at you going into mom mode already."
I cringe. Did she not hear me say that Jane needs stability? How am I supposed to provide that?
Starla reframes their earlier support. "You might be the cool aunt to our kids someday, but we'll be the doting aunts to yours now."
Bellamie gives wholehearted agreement.
A dark laugh bubbles up. "What if I screw up? What if I break her?"
"You won't," Starla assures me.
The shock subsides enough that tears threaten. I blink them back. "I need to tell Hudson."
I type out a text to him:We need to talk right away.
"Want us to tag along?"
