Page 106 of Happy Harbor
“What does that mean?”
“It means I’m leaving. There is no way I will live in the same town with that woman when she embarrassed me so much as a kid. She can’t keep promises, obviously. And I won’t let my daughter go through what I did.” Josie could feel her emotions getting out of hand. She knew she wasn’t thinking or acting rationally. She knew she was reacting from the worst parts of herself, the parts that were hurt most when she was a kid.
“You can’t just leave. What about us?”
She stood up, a tear rolling down her cheek. “I care about you, Walker. More than I want to. But I can’t choose you over myself. I just can’t.”
“Where are you going?”
She walked toward the bottom of the stairs. “I’m going to pack. I don’t want to be here when she comes back. I was offered a position at my old company, a good one. I turned it down because I didn’t want to lose what I was building here with my mother and with you and the restaurant. But I can’t do this again.”
He followed her into the foyer. “So you’re just gonna leave? You’re just gonna walk away like nothing ever happened? Like this relationship we’re building doesn’t even matter? After everything I did for you?”
She turned and squinted. “Oh, I get it. I’m supposed to be beholden to you? Because you helped me save the restaurant? I told you a million times how much I appreciated it, but I didn’t know it meant that Iowedyou something.”
He looked at her, hurt on his face. She couldn’t help it. Nothing mattered more to her than getting out of town as quickly as possible.
“I never said you owed me anything. I did everything for you because I care. I just thought you felt the same way about me.” Without another word, he walked through the kitchen and out the back door.
She didn’t have the time or energy to think more about Walker and how she’d hurt him. She ran up the stairs to Kendra’s room, ready to wake her up and tell her they were leaving, but she was still sleeping peacefully.
Josie sat near the end of her bed and watched her sleep. It was something she hadn’t done since Kendra was a baby. She remembered spending hours watching her sleep, like it was the most interesting thing she’d ever seen in her life.
Guilt washed over her like an ocean wave, threatening to knock her off her feet. Kendra was thriving in Happy Harbor, except for a life-threatening wasp sting, of course. She was supposed to take her test tomorrow. She had plans to go to college. She had a lovely boyfriend. Was it fair to yank all of that away from her because of Diane’s drunken behavior?
Her chest tightened. How was she supposed to tell her daughter that her life didn’t matter? That her feelings didn’t count? She was almost an adult now. She should have a choice. Why was it always Josie’s feelings that forced change?
Josie slipped out of the room and into the darkened hallway, her back pressed against the wall. How could her mother do this to her? Again? It didn’t seem real. Josie had believed her when she said she was in recovery. She’d had such hope for a genuine relationship. Why would Diane do this?
Was it about Dan? Had Diane been spending time with him while Kendra was fighting for her life in the ER? Was she downing a bottle of vodka with her old boyfriend, not caring at all about her daughter and granddaughter?
And then there was Walker. Why had she said such things to him? He was only trying to help. He’d done nothing but try to protect her and help her from the moment they met. No other man had ever treated her the way he did. Why was she willing to let Diane’s mistakes ruin her new relationship?
In that moment, Josie realized that her mother had made a mistake. She didn’t even feel angry about it anymore. She felt pity. She felt sorrow. She felt changed.
Change. It was something she’d touted for years: “People can’t change.”
Was it possible she’d refuted her own argument? That she herself had changed, thus proving she’d been wrong about so many people and situations throughout her life?
So many thoughts and emotions overwhelmed her exhausted body. Instead of packing, she went to bed. She lay down, stared at the moonlit ceiling, and drifted off to sleep. Tomorrow, maybe she’d be more clearheaded. Maybe things would look different in the light of day.
* * *
“Good morning.” Josie took her forehead off the kitchen bar and saw her beautiful daughter standing there, hair a mess, her eyes puffy.
“Oh my gosh!” she said, running over to her and giving her a big hug.
“You’re smothering me,” Kendra choked out, laughing. Josie pulled back and looked at her, placing a hand on each of her cheeks.
“You scared me to death!”
“It’s not like I went out hunting for an angry wasp, Mom,” she said, acting like none of it was a big deal. She walked to the coffeepot and poured herself a cup. “When did you get back?”
“Last night. You were already asleep, but I sat on your bed for a while and watched you sleep.”
Kendra looked at her. “That’s creepy.”
“A little, I suppose.”
