Page 48 of Sensing Selma
No, I finally concluded. I had no reason to feel guilty at all. I knew enough about him, and I knew enough about how he made me feel.
His kisses had been so hot, so wild and his hands...going up my skirt, touching me in such surprising ways. I’d never felt so hot, so ready, so eager.
Yes, I’d been uncertain about the circumstances at first – outdoors, in the wild, out in the open - and I’d been a little shy and unsure about telling him what I wanted. But when I’d spoken up, he’d responded just as I knew he would.
“Let’s go back to your room,” I’d finally managed to whisper.
With a wicked chuckle, he’d swept me off my feet and carried me out of the woods as I giggled all the way. Once in the garden, we quieted down, made sure no one was around, then we’d snuck inside and tiptoed up to his room.
His room...heaven.Everything about being with him was heaven. I had no memory of what his room looked like. Was it dark and masculine? Was it bright and colorful? I had no clue, and I had no interest in knowing. All that mattered was him and what he did to me.
“I’m so hungry for you,” he’d said.
“Then feast on me, Damen. Feast on me.”
Indeed. He’d feasted on me. He’d made love to me. It’d been fast, and hungry, and oh, so urgent...and over way too soon. I’d wanted more. I’d wanted to start again.
For a short minute, he’d run his tender fingers over my skin. He’d kissed my neck and the tip of my nose. And then he’d slipped off me to lay at my side.
He’d looked at me with sleepy eyes. “You are so fabulous, Holly. Promise me we’ll do this again. I think I would die if you were to tell me we could never do this again.”
I’m ready, I’d wanted to say.Right here and now.Let’s go. Instead, I’d nodded and silently looked forward to our next encounter.
He’d smiled, his tired eyes barely able to stay open, “But for now, be a dear and close the door on your way out,” he’d said as I’d prepared to lay my head on his chest. “I have to be up and ready before sun-up tomorrow morning.”
Surprised by the request, I’d been tempted to show my displeasure, but I knew there was no point. “Of course,” I’d simply said.
Truth was, I fear he’d find me too clingy and selfish if I told him of my disappointment, but I had truly wanted to stay in his arms all night long.
And now, as I sat alone in my room, I realized I needed to talk to someone. I had to share with someone how he’d made me feel. If I kept it all inside, I was certain I’d explode.
I stood up and walked out of my room. Without even thinking of where I was going, I found myself at Susan’s door. I knocked. When no response came, I went to her adjacent office and knocked again.
“Come in.”
I opened the door to find her seated at her desk. She looked so prim and proper, so mature and responsible. Wearing a gray cardigan sweater over a darker gray shirt, she looked matronly all while exuding professionalism.
“Holly,” she said with surprise. She immediately turned away from her computer screen and faced me. “What is it? Is it Mother?”
“No. Mother is fine,” I said as I came to sit in the chair facing her desk. “I just wanted to come chat with you for a bit. I haven’t seen much of you lately and realized that if I didn’t come and intrude during your workday, I might not get the chance to talk to you at all.”
“I am in my room every evening after dinner,” she said. “But now is fine. I’m glad you came. I’m in much need of a break from all these numbers.”
“How are things? Do you like working for Keely?”
“Very much. It’s very enjoyable work.”
“And I see that you’ve gotten over having to move to Moon Manor.”
She nodded. “This is very nice. It’s very pleasant here.”
“Are you still thinking about Bradley?”
She shook her head. “Not as much. My work keeps me busy, and I’m happy about that.”
“And I know that Mother is happy to be here as well. She seems to have completely forgotten Selma Sanctuary. I think she really loves Moon Manor.”
“Indeed.” She leaned back and smiled. “She’s been mysteriously hinting at a surprise, but she refuses to tell me any details. Has she mentioned anything about it to you?”
