Page 53 of Sensing Selma
“I suggest you go without making a fuss.”
I had no intention of making any fuss at all. I wanted to get as far away from that place as I could.
The guard shoved me out the door and into the pouring rain.
Numb, I walked down the street, barely aware of where I was. I’d heard of heartache before, of the pain of having your heart broken, but I had never thought of the actual pain...the physical pain. And yet, that was what I felt. Damen might as well have punched me in the gut. I was certain that it wouldn’t have been more painful.
I didn’t want to cry, but the pain of holding it in only made matters worse. Would passers-by know I was crying if I walked through the rain? Hadn’t so many songs been written about crying in the rain?
And suddenly, they burst through. The tears streamed down my face, the heat of my tears mingling with the coolness of the rain.
I shivered. Drenched in the cold rain, I realized I’d left my umbrella behind. I wasn’t even sure where I’d left it. I wrapped my arms around myself, trying to stave off the cold, but I shivered more and more violently.
The bright lights of commerce and nightlife disappeared as I found myself on a dark deserted street.
I was lost, mentally, physically, and emotionally.
Hopeless, I sat on a stoop and hugged myself as rain continued to pour down on me. My hair, my dress...oh heavens, my shoes...all ruined.
How could he do this to me? He loved me, didn’t he? He’d always been so tender, so caring, so attentive. I closed my eyes, seeing that sated grin on his face. He’d enjoyed every minute with me. Only two nights ago. That was when he’d brought me to his room to make love to me. Two nights. And now...
Where was his heart? Had he a heart at all?
Susan. She had been right. Why had I not profited from her wisdom. She knew. She saw right through him. She saw the scoundrel that he truly was. The lying cheat that he was.
I cried my frustration out, letting the emotions drain me until I had nothing left to cry. My heartache left me empty, a huge void deep inside me.
The rain stopped suddenly, leaving only the drippings from the trees to fall on me. In a stupor, I stood and turned back to where I’d come from. I knew I had to get out of the cold, but a part of me just didn’t care. Shivering violently, I found my way back to the brightly lit streets, heavily peopled with party-goers and tourists.
The happier people seemed, the angrier I became. It wasn’t fair. How could people be so happy and merry while others were clearly so miserable?
They passed me by, paying no mind to my pain.
I turned to run away although I had no idea where to go. But my first step had me running into a hard and uncompromising body.
“Excuse me,” I said as I tried to push past him.
“Holly?”
The name barely filtered through to my brain. Damen? Had Damen come out to find me?I was silly enough to believe it for that second.
I looked up to his face. “Major Cooper? Major Cooper, is that you?”
“Indeed, Miss Holly. What on earth are you doing out here?” He looked at the state I was in. “You’re drenched to the bone. For heaven’s sake, your lips are blue.”
His friend leaned in to take a better look at me. “We have to get her warmed up. My car is just around the block. I’ll go get it and bring it here.”
“Yes,” Major Cooper said as he shrugged off his coat and wrapped it around me.
His friend disappeared and returned moments later, pulling his car up to the curb. He stepped out to open the car door and Major Cooper helped me into the back seat.
I looked at the friend who seemed so familiar. I knew I’d seen him before. In a dream? In a movie? At Moon Manor?
I had no idea. All I knew was that I had finally found warmth. Major Cooper got into the back seat with me, holding me to his warm body and adding to the much-needed warmth the car provided.
“Should we take her to Moon Manor?”the friend asked.
That voice. That smooth, calm, soothing voice. Yes, I knew that voice, just as I knew that face, just as I knew...
