Page 64 of Sensing Selma
He pressed his lips in regret. “I still have a lot of work to do. The Theatre Royal is almost done, but you know how it is...details, details, details. I have a meeting with one of the contractors.”
I nodded despite not having any idea what details he could be talking about. “Where are you staying while I’m here in your house?”I said.
“I’m staying at my place in Derbyshire. This is just my littlepied-a-terrefor when I need to come to London.” He laughed. “Listen to me. That makes me sound like such a snob.”
“Well, if it’s the truth...it is what it is.” I looked around us as we reached the front door. “It is a very nice little secondary home. You have very...interesting taste.”
He laughed.
“I know I’m going to like it here very much.”
“Good.” He opened the door but hesitated. “If it’s all right with you, I’d like to come by every once in a while...not that I would necessarily be checking in on you, but...well, I do have to be at the Theatre Royal tomorrow afternoon. I could drop in afterward...maybe I’d take you up on that dinner invitation.”
“I would like that very much.”
He smiled. “Good. Very good.”
*****
IWAS AT THE PIANOevery day, for hours. The music came forth with surprising ease. At times I was barely conscious of what I played. As was my habit, I recorded every session on my phone and almost every time that I listened to the playback, I was surprised by the melodies I’d composed. So much of it was dark, much darker than was appropriate. So much angst.
Nonetheless, I found lyrics to accompany those dark notes.
A broken heart means nothing to you
I know I’m just one of many
A passionate flame you snuff out like a candle
Are you happy?
You left me in the dark, out in the freezing rain
I bet you forgot me so fast
Tossed out like the trash...is that how you handle
A crush?
Building hatred comes so easy
You throw away those who would love you
I hate what you made me feel
I hate what you made me become
I hate that you can go on with your life
I hate that I still ask why
I slammed my fingers into the keys and grunted my frustration.
Hearing a shuffling sound, I looked up.
“I rang, but you didn’t answer,” Major Cooper said.
I pressed an unhappy smile. “You didn’t catch me at a very charitable moment.”
