Page 92 of Hooked On Him
“You,” I say like a corny fucker. “You're my prettiest piece of sea glass.”
“Oh my god.” Levi laughs, burying his face into my chest. “You didn’t just say that.”
“Oh, I did.” I chuckle, rolling us over so that he’s on his back and I’m caging him against the ground. “Be ready for all the cheesy bullshit. Because I’m gonna give it all to you, Levi. I’m gonna love you so hard. Make sure you’re happy and cared for. I’m going to spoil the shit out of you. Just wanted to give you a heads up.”
The pure love in his eyes makes me want to cry. Please, baby, remember how you feel about me after I tell you what I’m about to tell you.
The smile slips from my lips, and Levi notices. “What’s wrong?”
“We need to talk,” I whisper.
His face falls. “I don’t like the sound of that.” He whispers. “Are you really about to break up with me after we just confessed how we feel?”
“Fuck no.” I scoff. “If I had it my way, I’d be dragging you down to the courthouse and putting a ring on your finger.”
His eyes widen. “Really?”
“Too much?” I wince.
“Oddly, no,” he chuckles.
I turn to the side and sit down on the blanket next to him. Levi sits up and mimics my pose.
“I need to come clean.” I bite my lip.
“About what?”
“Everything,” I whisper.
His face falls. “What do you mean?”
I close my eyes and take a deep breath. Out with it, Austin.
“I’ve been in love with you since we were in high school.”
His eyes widen. “You... what?”
I nod. “I’ve loved you since then. My feelings for you are what made me realize I wasn’t straight. Because all the dirty things I wanted to do to you were far from what a straight man wanted.” I laugh softly.
“W-why didn’t you say anything?” He asks, blinking at me, looking like he can’t believe what I’m saying.
“Because I was young and scared.” I rub my hands nervously on my thighs. “There was so much on the line. We were friends, and I didn’t want to scare you off or ruin what we had. I was also still coming to terms with my sexuality, and I don’t think I really fully accepted it until I graduated high school. The idea of my dad finding out scared me. Back then, I feared him. What he would say or do. I was already a disappointment. I didn't want to add to the list.”
“Austin.” Levi’s voice softens, taking my hands in his. I hold him tight, afraid that if I let go, he will run.
“After a while, I realized, fuck him. I was who I was, and I didn’t care what he thought. But by the time I accepted who I was, you were already with Brogan. At the time, I thought youwere in love and happy. It hurt to be around you, to see you with another man when I wanted you for myself. But I didn’t have the right to mess up your life by telling you how I felt. So when we started to drift apart, I let it happen.” I close my eyes and shake my head. “Biggest mistake of my life. I wish so fucking much I could go back and tell you how I felt. Tell you to leave that asshole and be with me.”
“I wish you did,” he whispers.
That’s a punch to the gut knowing everything he’s been through with his ex. If I'd just told Levi, would I have saved him from all that hurt and pain, or would he have rejected me and stayed with Brogan? I’ll never know.
“I’ve never stopped wanting you. The feelings I had for you never went away.” Here we go, Austin. Time to lay it all out there. “So, when Cole came to me, telling me he had a friend who needed a date to a wedding, I jumped at the chance to see you again.”
His brows furrow. “Wait.... I thought... I thought you didn’t know who you were being set up with.”
“I lied,” I whisper.
“You lied!?” he blinks, voice growing loud. “So you knew I was your date to the wedding?”
