Page 73 of Trick or Treat Nurse at My Feet
TYLER
The December sun filters through the branches of the massive oak tree on the north quad, creating dappled patterns across Ethan's face as he leans against me. We've claimed one of the wooden benches tucked away in a quieter corner of campus. Ethan's back against my chest as he reads from his nursing textbook, occasionally highlighting bits or making notes in the margins.
I have my own environmental engineering textbook open, but I've been distracted for the past fifteen minutes, watching the way the sunlight plays across Ethan's reddish-blonde hair, turning it to gold. He fits perfectly against me, like we were designed to occupy the same space. It's been more than a month since that first night in his apartment, and I still can't believe how this feels, how right it is to be with him.
"You're not reading," Ethan observes without looking up, a smile in his voice.
"I'm multitasking," Lips find the top of his head, soft and brief. "Learning about sustainable water systems and also cataloging all the different shades of gold in yourhair."
Ethan snorts, but I can see the tips of his ears turning pink. "You're ridiculous."
"Ridiculously into you," cheerfully I agree, earning an eye roll that doesn't hide his pleased smile.
I'm about to suggest we head to the library to actually get some studying done when a familiar voice calls out.
"Tyler! I thought that was you!"
Cher approaches, and I swear she's wearing the exact same outfit half the sorority girls on campus wear, those jeans that probably cost more than my textbooks, and one of those sweaters that looks basic but has some tiny logo that means it's expensive as hell. The blonde ponytail and sunglasses complete the look: Sorority Girl Level 100.
Ethan immediately sits up straight, pulling slightly away from me. I counter by sliding my arm more firmly around his waist.
"Hey, Cher," Keeping my tone as neutral as possible takes effort. We ended things amicably, well, as amicably as possible when you break up with someone because you realize you might be more into guys, so our few run-ins since have been awkward at best.
"I haven't seen you around much lately," she says, her eyes focused entirely on me as if Ethan doesn't exist. "You missed Sigma Phi's post midterms bash. It was epic."
"Had other plans." Fingers give Ethan's waist a gentle squeeze.
Cher's eyes flick briefly to Ethan, then back to me. "Listen, we're having a mixer next weekend with you guys at Delta Psi Omega. You should come by."
"Thanks, but I'll probably be busy," Ethan goes tense beside me. "By the way, you remember Ethan, right?"
Cher gives Ethan a cursory glance and a tight smile. "Sure, hi."
"Hi," Ethan replies quietly, and something in his subdued tone makes me look at him more closely. His face has taken on that carefully neutral expression I recognize as his shield, the same look he has whenever he talks about Ryan.
"Actually," The words come out stronger now. "Ethan's my boyfriend. We've been together for almost a month now."
Cher's smile freezes, her eyes widening slightly. "Oh! That's... nice. I didn't realize you were..." She trails off, gesturing vaguely.
"Bisexual, yeah, it was a bit of a revelation for me too."
She recovers quickly, her social training kicking in. "Well, that's great. Good for you both." She glances at her watch. "I should go, I have a chapter meeting in fifteen. See you around, Tyler."
With a final, barely perceptible nod to Ethan, she walks away, her heels clicking purposefully on the concrete path.
Turning to Ethan, who's staring at his textbook but not reading. "Sorry about that. She's not usually so..."
"It's fine," Ethan says, his voice carefully light. "Ex-girlfriends are always awkward."
But there's something in the set of his shoulders, the way he's holding himself, that tells me it's not fine. He's pulled back, not physically; he's still sitting close to me, but emotionally, he's retreated behind a wall.
"Hey," Fingers touch his chin, gently turning his face up. "What's going on in that head of yours?"
He shrugs, attempting a smile that doesn't quite reach his eyes. "Nothing. Just thinking about how gorgeous your ex is. You two make a very attractive couple."
There's something vulnerable in his tone that makes my heart ache. "Not as attractive as we are," I sayfirmly.
Ethan rolls his eyes, but there's a hint of genuine insecurity there that I haven't seen before. I'm struck by the realization that Ethan, confident, competent Ethan, might doubt how much I want to be with him.
