Page 51 of The Child of Rue Royale
“It’s okay, buddy,” he sings. But Aven only cries louder.
“He’s hungry,” I say, and he looks down at our son with a lost expression.
“I want him to know me.”
“He will. Just give it time, he will. He does already.” I take Aven in my arms, his perfect little body relaxing once he knows it’s me. “Now that you’re here, he will get to know your face, your voice, your smell. He’ll know you’re his daddy. Don’t worry.” Squeezing his hand, I wish I could wipe the pain from his eyes. But it has settled in deep, and only time can fix it.
He’s quiet, the quietest I’ve ever seen him, but he works with determination when he changes Aven’s diaper and clothes. Taking his new job seriously, he almost seems somber, but I know he’s taking in so much. His lost vampire life, his death, a new child, being in California with me and another witch. Yet throughout the morning, he’s by my side constantly, his hand always close to mine, our bodies always inches apart, as if he’s worried it can all vanish at a moment’s notice. And I understand that. But the spell worked, nothing will make him vanish unless he’s killed again. He’s here for good.
“JESUS CHRIST, I’VE BEEN DYINGto talk to you,” Mother shouts in my ear when I answer her phone call. I run outside to the deck for privacy, always worried about what could come out of her mouth.
“Yesterday was a crazy day. I’m…I’m just so happy and scared at the same time.”
“How is he? Is he okay? No side effects? Not being a vampire could be a problem. A huge problem, but if whatever Grandma said is the key, then maybe we won’t have to worry about that.”
I look to the house, as if Bastian could hear her endless chain of words.
“Yesterday he was so great. Today…he’s adjusting. He’s calling Nicola right now, so I’m sure that will be a lot for him.”
“Well, when are you going to ask him?” she asks, ignoring anything I say about Nicola. “How can you stand not knowing? It’s driving me crazy!”
“He seems a little fragile today. And he’s so remorseful about everything that’s happened.”
“Aster,” and there it is. That tone I know so well. “I supported you bringing him back for that purpose. I understand that you love him, but we need answers. The clock is ticking, and we are facing huge trouble soon. The elders are planning the blessing ceremony. I told them you would be traveling home in two weeks. They already don’t understand why you’re still out there.”
“Two weeks,” I repeat, my mind taking it all in. “Okay. I—I just don’t want him to think that’s the only reason I brought him back.”
“Well, it was supposed to be the only reason. He’s not back just because you loved him.”
“Yes, he is. I was doing it no matter what,” I fight back, then bite into my lip, steady anger causing my fingertips to crackle with power. I close my eyes, grounding myself. Mother is in New Orleans, doing the work, covering the mess I made. I’m so grateful Cassius gave me his writing, but I was going to bring Bastian back without my mother’s support, and she knows that.
I know we’ll have to return to New Orleans soon, and I miss it yet love the bubble of protection we have here in California. Hundreds of miles away. Life on our terms.
“I’ll do it tonight,” I tell her and end the call before I scream. Checking my phone, I see that Jade has sent me a text congratulating me, so I quickly respond with heart emoji’s for now.
After quickly filling Chantal in on my plan, I return to our room where Bastian is seated in my rocking chair, staring out the window at the ocean with my opened journal I wrote for him on his lap. I can see the deep introspection ticking within the walls of his chest. His beautiful face full of regret that I want to push away.
“Hey,” I say. “How did it go?”
He shakes his head, hand clenched over his mouth. I run to him, and he
pulls me onto him, his head pushing into my chest. “I can’t believe this all happened. I want to run down the goddamn beach, screaming I’m fucking back, but then I’m also so ashamed, so angry. I have never heard Nicola cry like that. Never. She cried so hard, so fucking hard. Then she Facetimed me to be sure.”
“But was she happy?” I say, wiping the wet from my cheeks.
He smiles. “Yeah, she was overcome. She wants to turn me again,” he says, eyes locking with mine. “She says I’m supposed to be a vampire.”
Cassius’s and Nicola’s desire to turn Bastian makes my stomach sway. I had loved him as a vampire—his strength, his mystery, his immortality (to an extent)—but now, the idea of growing old with him has sewn itself inside my heart, yet I stay quiet about my feelings on the matter.
We rock back and forth for a few minutes, hands just running along each other’s skin, soaking in the reality.
“Was that your mom you were talking to?”
I nod.
“And?”
“We’ll have to go home in a couple of weeks. But let’s not think about that now. Let’s just be. Enjoy this time we have.” I place my hand on his cheek, my thumb running across his mouth. “Don’t waste any of this precious life feeling regretful. You’re here now, and that’s what matters. I loved every part of you then, and every part of you now.”
