Page 50 of The Child of Rue Royale
“Wait, now that I’m human…do we need something?”
I shake my head. “I’m on birth control.”
“Why?” he asks, his face half smiling in surprise.
“Because I knew I was bringing you back.”
“Oh, thank God.”
But then the room fills with a cry. It takes me a second to catch my breath, but I’m soon sitting up, looking at my phone.
“It’s the time he usually eats,” I say, swallowing.
“Right,” he says quietly, both of us panting, remembering that we are parents. That things are different.
I pull Aven in my arms and place him between us, getting him settled to nurse. “I’m working on getting him to take a bottle too. That way you can feed him also.”
Bastian sits up, resting his elbow on his knee as he looks down at us.
“I would love that,” he whispers, watching us like we are some kind of magic show. “I didn’t want the first time to be a quickie in the bathroom anyways.” He smirks. “Well, my body did.”
“I wouldn’t have cared,” I say, and he nods as if saying “I know.”
“I would like it to be special.”
“It will be,” I assure him as he holds Aven’s hand.
“I just want to look at you both forever, and just soak in the fact that I have everything I ever wanted.” He slinks back down on the bed, his chest returning to a normal rhythm.
We fall asleep like that. Aven between us, Bastian’s hand on my hip, our feet intertwined, like we’re never meant to separate.
In the morning, my eyes blink open and meet Bastian’s stare. He’s still here. It’s not a dream, and my heart seems to sigh. Aven lies between us, his little arms stretching as he prepares to start fussing. I assess Bastian, chewing his lip, with a look I can’t place. Joy or sadness?
“You’re still here.” I swallow, my hand covering my mouth in disbelief.
“I’m still here.” His lip pulls up but his eyes are serious, his face long, so I bolt up.
“What’s wrong?”
“Nothing. Nothing’s wrong. I just…was watching you both sleep. And…I thought about what I’ve done.”
“What are you talking about?”
“I made a lot of mistakes, and I put you at risk and you allowed it. And I want you to know I will never do that again. Ever. And I’m so, so sorry.”
“Stop—”
“No, Aster. Don’t make excuses for me. You told me yourself that I was careless, and I told you I wasn’t. But I was. I was, and you risked everything for me. And then I go and get myself killed, and you risk it all over again to bring me back. I’m a father now, all I ever wanted to be, and now I have to live life like a human, and I can’t be reckless. I have a family now. It’s killing me that you went through it all alone.”
“I wasn’t alone. I had Chantal. My mom and Jade. I wasn’t alone.”
“But you didn’t have me. I’ll spend the rest of our lives making it up to you, I promise.”
“I don’t need any promises. I just need you.”
He looks between his child and me, eyes wetting, jaw tightening. “I wish I could kill Franklin all over again.”
My hand finds his cheek, stroking his jaw. Aven cries, so Bastian swoops him up before I have time to blink.
