Page 135 of I Dream of Dragons
And in that moment I feel more of my defenses crack. The tension in him, in his voice, the controlled panic, the history behind it…
“What is a puny little human born a heartbeat ago going to teach me about pain?”
Gods, my heart.
Don’t feel sorry for monsters, I tell myself.Don’t let him in. He’s thorny and jagged and will tear you apart.
But I can’t stop myself from stepping between him and the healers. As if he needs my protection.
They look apprehensive, pausing just inside the door. “Is he conscious?”
I nod. “Yes.”
“Right.” They exchange glances. Peer around me. “Oh, that looks bad.”
He growls and they flinch.
“Stop it,” I tell him.
Emboldened, they step closer. “You should step out,” they chorus after taking a look at his mangled back from afar, “and let us?—”
“She stays,” he barks and they recoil.
They cast me pleading looks.
So I stay. Not for them. But forhim.Even if the sight of his shredded back makes me want to throw up, even if the healers’ every touch on him sends bolts of pain through me. Jai didn’t want me to share the pain. Phaethon doesn’t care.
Or maybe he wants me to share his pain? And maybe I want that, too?
This is such a terrible idea.
First, I thought the king would show his true face because I convinced myself he was Mars and Mars couldn’t be such a bastard. And now I think Phaethon can be saved, that he can become human, when I should know that people don’t change.
People don’t change unless they want to change, unless they are capable of change, and Phaethon isn’t people. He is the original Eosphor. Arrogant, cruel, intent on conquering the Nine Worlds. So say the scriptures and legends. An intelligent being, now trapped and using every ruse at his disposal to get his way.
Through me.
Sometimes, though… sometimes all a person needs is a kind word and a helping hand. Right?
I’m in the process of pondering that thought when he grabs my fingers, a grimace distorting his handsome face. “Leli.”
“What is it?”
“Your touch makes his head quieter… and lessens the pain in this body.”
“How?”
“The bond between you.”
Fine, so he does need my touch for his own benefit—but how can I fault him for wanting to lessen the pain? Does Jai feel it? Am I doing it for both of them?
“The bond between Jai and me was never completed,” I whisper.
“Even incomplete, your bond is stronger than anything I’ve ever encountered in my long life, stronger than most official bonds between couples.” He jerks a little when one of the healers scoops out ointment from a jar and starts applying it to his back. “Your bond is fated. Innate. Meant to be.”
I give him a skeptical look. “Why are you so helpful and nice all of a sudden?”
“We fucked. Fucking?—”
